The love of my life has left me and I'm lost without her. I met her three and a half years ago, and she changed my life completely, I never thought I would ever feel the way I do about anybody, I never even thought the feelings I feel for her were possible. We had problems due to her past, and me coming to terms with it, but I always loved her unconditionally, and I thought she loved me the same. I don't feel comfortable opening up to anyone the way I opened up to her, so I feel lost and hopeless now because I have no one to go to. There is no one I want to go to. She is all I want in life and all I've needed since the moment I met her, so life seems meaningless without her. I would end my life if it didn't cause a burden to my family, and mainly because I would fear that if I did she would blame herself for it. The last month of our relationship I was going through a hard time because I had lost my job, and felt inadequate, at the same time she started spending more time with friends and less time with me, and I got paranoid and scared of losing her. I would get upset when other guys talked to her, and be worried someone would steal her from me, and I took it out on her, didn't trust her even though she had more than proved herself to me in our relationship. I knew things were getting bad, but I didn't realise how bad until it was too late. The day she broke up with me I lost her completely, she changed as a person completely. She wanted nothing to do with me. I wanted to stay in our apartment to try and work things out with her, but started seeing another guy three days after we broke up, and stayed at his place most nights to avoid coming back to the home we shared together. She said they were just friends, but they together now and it only a few weeks later, and they weren't that big of friends before so I have to face facts and accept she was lying. She came home to me every night before the break up so I don't want to assume that she was with him during our relationship. We lived in England together but we both originally from Ireland, so a few days after she dumped me my mother convinced me to come home. I asked if I could spend time together, even as just friends, and be home the night before I leave to go home, at least to say goodbye, but she refused and stayed with the new guy in her life. I couldn't believe that she would do that to me, we met each other in Ireland, fell in love in Ireland, and I moved to England with her, at her request, to be with her, and she completely abandoned me. I left my job and my life at home for her, now i'm back in ireland with no job, no friends, no life, all I had was her and the life we made together, now I have nothing. I try to stay in contact with her but she wants nothing to do with me, she said she wants to stay friends, but any time I contact her she tells me to leave her alone, she brings the new guy back to the home we shared together, I told her what she doing is wrong, but she just told me not to bother her. She so cold, it like she a different person. Friends we shared say the same and have fell out with her, because they say what she doing is wrong and she disagrees. It like the love of my life is dead and this horrible person has been born from her. I still love her, and hope something has caused this change because the world has lost something special if she no longer the person she was. I dont see a solution to my problem, but I am in bits and in constant pain and I want it to end. Everyone says it will get better and easier, but it gets harder every day. I was born the day I met her and wish I died the day she left me, but I'm still here, and every day feels like hell. She has been in my mind from the day I met her, so I don't me see ever forgetting her. I try to be happy for her, but it hard when knowing she no longer the person she was, the person I loved. Its like i'm grieving, but I've grieved before and it was easier because the person you grieve for is in another place, an afterlife, and they never truly gone, but the person she was has gone without trace, and she is this horrible, ugly, cold person that I don't recognize. I don't know what I expect from putting my story on this, but I don't know how to deal with this pain. The woman I loved was the answer to all my problems, the answer and motivation to every action I made since I fell in love with her. I don't know how to continue with life and i'm desperate for a way out. If anyone can help me please do
It's probably hard to believe right now but with time it does all gets easier. When you're heart broken there can seem no end or fix to the pain. Most people I'm sure can vouch for that one. It's normal to feel lost and empty when you have been with someone for a long period of time and invested a lot into the relationship. My best advice is to be kind to yourself, do the things that you enjoy and perhaps didn't give the time to when you were with her. Find work and rebuild friendships. Try build on your own self worth a bit and you will find that you will have a more healthy relationship in the future without the inadequacies you had in the last. You may feel like the loneliest person on the planet right now but a lot of people have gone through the same and have come out stronger. From personal experience with an ex boyfriend, I look back now and wonder what I made all the fuss about and missed when the relationship ended. You will get there!
Hi there please you are not alone I can completely understand what you are going through! I had a bad past in my childhood & I married my childhood sweetheart he knew everything & was my rock we have been together for 23 years I'm 38 he is 40 & as soon as he turned 40 he was a changed man his behaviour was odd on phone/iPad til 3 in the morn texting he told me he didn't love me anymore & people thought we wud b the last ones to split up I didn't see it coming I thought we were together forever sorry to speak! He would do anything for me at one point & now he is so cold & nasty I've never seen this side of him he has told lies & got evidence he has spent a night at a hotel for 2 people even though he has denied it! He told me I'm pretty & will soon find someone that is not what I wanted to hear as you can imagine!I'm finding it very difficult coping with it & with Xmas around the corner I don't know how I will cope financially as I only work part time people have told me you will get through it but I understand what you say its hard to believe it at this moment in time the moral of this is please you are not alone & it's very devastating! Hope all works out ok for you in the end!