Getting back together with my ex
My boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me and moved out about 3 months ago. We have had little to no contact, other than a couple of exchanges about bills etc. I did forward him a box of the last of his things and emailed him that it was on the way and to look for it. This was at the beginning of Dec. I got a text from him a couple of weeks later saying he never got the box, but I figured it was taking longer because of the holiday's so I didn't respond to him. About a week later I got an email from him wondering why I didn't respond, and if I was ok. I sent him a short email stating that I was busy with work and the holidays and the box will probably come soon. He then texted me a few times saying that he still loved me, but he has to take time for himself and he is going to counseling and the gym and feels healthier than he has in years and maybe we could go out and have a few laughs and not talk about the past. I agreed, because I still love him and want him back, but I played it very cool, letting him choose the day. He chose the 3rd weekend in Jan. Almost 3 weeks away. I was surprised, but I agreed. then he texts me the next day and moves it up to 2 weeks closer, but also said he was terrified to get into a relationship again, with anyone, and is confused, but I agreed to see him. 2 days after that he texted and said he wanted to take me out for New Years Eve!! He said he had it all planned and it included some of my favorite things. We texted often over the next few days, making arrangements for NYE. We went out and it was a great night, we laughed and ate and kissed at midnight. It could not have gone better. I stayed over, which was a little odd, but ok. When I got home the next day, I texted him that I had a wonderful time and thanked him for all the thought he had put into the night. He responded that he had a great time, but then again with mentioning his confusion, and he doesn't want to hurt me, and is scared that we will see each other a couple of times and what if he decides it's not what he wants. UGH....I tried to keep cool again, I said that yes I loved him and yes, my goal would be that we were back together, but that I am in no hurry, and we both need to get physically and emotionally healthier in the meantime. I told him I was flying to Florida to see my mom for about 4 days, and I will let him contact me if he wanted when I got back. So here is the question??? Am I playing my cards right? I want him to come back only if he wants to, not because he is pressured or guilt-ed into it, but I also don't want him to think I have moved on either.
Gee, you lived with this dude for 2 years and you can't figure out what he's doing?
Obviously he needs a break. I suggest you give him lots of space. He apparently is working on some things.
This would be a good time for you to do the same. If you two get together after that, both will have grown.
In the meantime, don't let him use you as a booty call, since that's what has happened.