Friends did not acknowledge my daughters wedding
My daughter lives over 3000 miles from home and recently eloped. I am very happy she is married and crazy about her new husband. She is not coming home for at least a year due to her hectic schedule so I am not planning a post wedding party. I am very hurt that several of my very close friends have not sent her a wedding card or any acknowledgement to the fact she is happily married. These friends also have daughters who have had traditional weddings and I was very generous with both gifts and help at showers and stags etc. I know etiquette says it is not mandatory to give gifts if you are not invited to the wedding however these friends have known her all her life and is it too much to expect them to send her a card? I have dropped several hints and they do not show any interest in sending her well wishes. My best friends daughter is expecting and she is hinting for me to help at the baby shower. I feel very resentful that I have done so much for her daughter and now she has done nothing for mine. My daughter does not need gifts but it would mean so much to me if they would only do some little thing to acknowledge her day. I feel if I say something it would only make things worse. Should I find new friends?
Only you can answer whether you need new friends.
If your 'close' friends don't acknowledge your daughter's marriage in any way then their actions are speaking.
If they were 'real' close/best friends they would have discussed your daughter's happiness with you.
'Real' friends don't/won't tell you what you want to hear... 'real' friends support you in every way and usually it's the little and unnoticed things they do that count the most...and etiquette doesn't come into it.
Did you sent out official announcements of the marriage/wedding?
Word of mouth is no way to let people know, then expect a gift of acknowledgement.
I shared the news with them confidentially a couple days before and called everyone personally to let them know the happy news. I also made a pretty announcement which I posted to both mine and my daughters facebook wall. I feel personal announcements would be a plea for gifts which we do not expect...all I did expect was my friends to send her a nice card or note wishing her well, or at the most a very small sentimental token gift.
Hello Niagara -
Maybe just responding in kind would make more of an impression. I do not understand 'friends' and their unconcern except for themselves. You should always be on the lookout for new friends, so keep looking.
Feel better - Whatsup