My partner sleeps all day
on Jan 28 2014 at 12:01
My partner of 3 years sleeps til at least 3pm, whereas I am up at 8am. I find it really frustrating as even when he wakes up it takes at least an hour for him to wake up properly, and the whole day is wasted and I cannot plan for us to do anything together. He says he does not do it on purpose but never does anything about it. Yesterday he was upset about something I said/did and he stayed in bed til 9pm and he got up when I told him to come and have his dinner. I used to work every day til 1pm and he always made a point of being up and having lunch with me when I got home. Now I am out of work it looks like he doesnt feel the need to stick to any sort of routine. I asked him to help me with the decorating but I ended up doing it all myself in the mornings when I got up. When he gets up he will prepare something for dinner which I am grateful for but to be honest I can do that myself, I would rather he did some work round the house to help me out more. Is there any way he will change or will our lives be like this forever?
on Jan 28 2014 at 13:54
Is he working?
on Jan 28 2014 at 14:35
hi, no hes not working, he relies on me, I am looking for work but he won't look. I cant kick him out as he has nowhere to go.
on Jan 28 2014 at 15:32
Yes, you can kick him out Anna, it's the best thing that could happen to him!
If he's been doing this for 3 years, and you've let him do it, then it'll stay that way until you make some changes because it's obvious he won't.
And if you ask "will our lives be like this forever"?..yes it will while you put up with it.
on Jan 28 2014 at 15:39
I agree with Man.
You have allowed this to go on for all this time, now you are upset about it. You created your own monster.
He is a slacker - move him out and get him on his way.
on Jan 28 2014 at 16:09
He has been like this for about 9 months now, sometimes I think he is going through a depression, (wont go to gp either!), he used to work hard, either that or hes started to take me for granted. I think you are both right though.
on Jan 29 2014 at 09:32
Ok Anna, now that you've shed a bit more light into the problem, his work ethic is not the issue because, if you state, he used to work hard then that means he knows how to.
Get him to the GP because he's lost his spark, something may have triggered it or he could have depression issues from the past.
Give him the ultimatum, get to the GP or get out because it'll eventually grind you down and then you'll be the one leaving.
on Jan 31 2014 at 14:31
If sorry but tell him to get out and find a job or get his ass out of bed and clean and you go out and find work, I'm currently home on disability. My wife works 9 hrs a day and then has to travel to the daycare to get our kids and then come home, the last this I would expect her to do is come home and clean and take care of things. I clean everyday and have the house spotless when she gets home, so there is nothing for her to do but make supper, eat and then I joy the evening. And we as a family can play with the kids and put them to bed and then the night is ours cause everything is done