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Sex issue. Need help

Posted by
on Mar 13 2014 at 03:34
Member since: 13 March 2014
S-e-x advice I need your help and advice with this situation.

Okay, so recently my girlfriend was being pretty distant from me and not wanting to hook up and just being a little bit quiet. I layed low a little bit and gave her a couple days to just think everything out and then i asked her about it. I was wondering why she was acting so distant and why she was denying hookups. And don't get me wrong, our relationship is not all hooking up and we don't do it that much, but me being a guy i obviously want to do it a lot. We have been dating for a little over 5 months and i am her first everything(Kiss, Oral, and Sex). We have had sex a couple of times about a month ago and a couple of weeks ago, but since then she has been a little bit hesitant. I asked if she enjoyed the sex and if it was good and i wanted her to be completely honest with me, and she said that yes she really did enjoy it and it was good. We kept talking about the subject and she finally broke down, and said that she didn't think that sex was going to mean as much as it did, just thought it would be just another thing, and she just didn't think she was quite ready for it. I wondered maybe she isn't attracted to me anymore and just doesn't want to hook up with me anymore, but she kept saying no that wasn't the issue and that she is very attracted to me still, and i make her so happy and that wasn't the reason whatsoever. She also mentioned that just sometimes she just isn't in the mood. (Most of the time she isn't in the mood) In my past experience most girls love hooking up with their boyfriends and enjoy having sex all the time, and i just found that very weird. She kept saying she isn't like most girls and because she is so busy and always tired from being so busy with school, sports, and with parents putting pressure on her that she just is never in the mood. Honestly at this point, i do love my girl and i want to try to do things to help her out and improve this but i don't know what to do? i consider sex and hooking up very important in the relationship along with the emotional connection, which we have a very good emotional connection. Is she feeling she wasn't quite ready because she doesn't love me yet? A couple of my friends have said that girlfriends that they have been with broke down just like her their first time, but the more they had sex the more comfortable it was and they didn't act that way again. I just don't want to have to put that pressure upon her especially right after the long talk we had about it. I know this probably sounds very confusing but i need to know what i should do next or what i should do about this situation, maybe what are some possible options to tell her, make her feel comfortable, or just wait a little bit until she is ready again?

All types of ideas or thoughts are welcome, just trying to figure out whats next. Thanks

Sex issue. Need help

Reply from
on Mar 13 2014 at 04:19
Member since: 29 December 2013
Jonah, if you have any respect for your GF you will back off and let her sort herself out.

She's given you a heads up what she thinks of sex and regardless of what your friends tell you, you can't make her have more sex with you to get her to become comfortable with it.

Your problem is your post is all about sex, you call it sex.. but you need INTIMACY in a successful relationship which is a completely different thing. Maybe that's what your GF needs.

If you really want to help her out and improve your situation, then back off and say nothing more about it.

She'll speak to you when she's ready to discuss it.

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