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Is he avoiding me?

Posted by
LONELOVER
on Mar 19 2014 at 09:36
Member since: 19 March 2014
LGBT advice After being single for a while and knowing for years that I was ready to find someone to get to know and settle down, I start talking to a great guy a week ago. The conversations were fantastic. We would talk on the phone for 2-4 hours and text throughout the day and into the early morning hours. We have not met in person yet because we both agreed that we want to take it slow and be sure that we are both into getting to know each other and committed to making the effort first. He recently got out of a bad relationship where his ex cheated on him so I understand the desire to want to take it slow both for time to heal, and to get past the defenses. However, for the past couple of days, he seems to be texting me less, not responding for 10-12 hours when it used to be no more than 2-4 hours, I've told him that I'd like to talk on the phone again and hes somewhat just ignored those requests, and then tonight he didn't text me at all when he was off work or at all tonight and he always has since we started talking but I see him sign on and off of Skype. Its not a distance thing, he lives 2 miles from me. My concern is that he is avoiding me because of one or more reasons (he is still taking the break up hard, he is no longer interested in me, he has found someone else). He said when we've talked that he has always been honest and open when it comes to dating in that if he feels that it won't work he will tell the other person. He has said not such thing to me nor has there been any indication in our conversations that he was loosing interest or that he may be talking to someone else. I am unsure if I should confront him on this, or just see where it goes. He told me that one important thing he looks for in the begining or a relationship is how consistant the other person is in making an effort for him, like messaging him on a regular basis and that is exactly what I do. I message him good morning, before he starts work, after he is off work, and before I go to sleep. Up until 2 days ago, he would be the one to message me first on each of those times and after we were both home we would move the conversation from texting to Skype (cell phone service is not that great). I am unsure how to proceed, or what is going on and I really need some advise here. I have such a good strong feeling about him, but I'm starting to feel like that may be in vain.

Is he avoiding me?

Reply from
MOUNTAIN
on Mar 19 2014 at 14:46
Member since: 24 February 2014
You are driving yourself mad here worrying about something that you cannot answer.

It is possible that he is okay and busy doing other things....

If the guy has trust issues maybe he felt he gave too much too soon to you.... you know quiet abit about him.... I think the lack of contact is him taking back control here..... it is possible he feels he has left himself open to be hurt again...

it is also too soon for him ....... be his friend....... hang out and no pressures.... they will only make him run away.... like he is possibly doing now......

I would advise let him take back some control and you have no right to try to step in there and help him... he will when HE is ready....

This should not be surprising to you...... Listen to him ......

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