How do I end this?
I know this relationship problem might sound minor but it has been very stressful. I meet this guy who is 6 years older than me and we have had a thing for 4 months now. He is by far the best guy I've had a thing with, that doesn't say much from previous relationships but it makes it hard. He doesn't live in my city but he comes every weekend to see me, we haven't defined our situation because I haven't wanted to since its been perfect. I recently found out that he took pictures of me, without me knowing. He sent these pictures to his best friend who happens to be my best friends brother. I clearly need to end things with him since that's a really messed up thing to do. However he did this a while back and we have gotten a lot closer since. I've tried to end things before but I like him too much, but I believe I deserve better. How do I end things with him without telling him I know about the pictures (because I don't want to get my friends in trouble or make a bigger deal out of this) but yet break up with him somehow letting him know he messed up? Hes coming this weekend and I know I have to do it, I just don't know how. I would love any advice and I know some people here have bigger problems but I just really don't know what to do.
Sweetheart just because he is older does not mean he is mature..... that is a violation of your person....
You do deserve better and this is causing you stress.
I personally would tell him the truth about the pictures. I would want him to know that he cannot invade your privacy like that behind your back and your friends will tell you.
He should be ashamed.... then I would end it. He will want an explanation as to why it is ending...... why hide the truth. Your friends will not get into trouble ... also do not let him try to put this back on you. It does not matter how you found out you did start there do not let him try and worm his way out.
Speak to him openly. Tell him this is not acceptable to you. Tell him you feel cheated. You need to put it plainly how you felt.
To protect your friends may be you can probably say you accidently discovered it when they were sharing some other pictures with you.
But are you ready to end the relationship over this? Because you say you have got closer after this incident. Which means this is a serious issue but not enough to end the relation between you both. Think well and decide.
MOUNTAIN Thank you I know your right but my best friends brother and his group of friends (the guy I'm in this problem with) are a lot older but as you said not very mature and cause a lot of drama, I'm scared the pictures might get out to get back at me for ending things. It wouldn't be the first time this happened in his group of friends. But I can't end things without a reason and my reason is a pretty good but I’m scared of telling him.
SHIVANGI that's great advice on accidentally seeing the picture and yes, sadly I'm still unsure about ending things with this guy. At first we were both talking to other people and I knew the girl he was talking to (around the time the pictures were sent). However he broke things off with this girl and doesn't talk to any other girls but me. The other thing is that his best friends live in my city yet he never sees them anymore, he only comes to see me which he didn’t before. I just don't know if that's a good enough reason to not end things with him.
I suppose it matters what kind of pictures these are. Are they just casual, group or couples pics or are they intimate, private pics. He may have innocently shared these pics to show what and who is in his life at that time. You MUST consider his intentions.
I have a feeling that the pictures are not the main thing you are not happy with.
How do you drop a guy? You simply call or write him and tell him that - while you have enjoyed the past 4 months - you realize that he is not the one for you romantically and that you are moving on.
I imagine he's been dumped before, so don't sweat it. Just stay away from his "gang" and those who might try to put guilt on you or know details.
From what you say, I guess there is a connection between you both. Like CIM's post said, it is possible he sent it in his excitement. Some guys like to show off their girls. You will only know when you speak to him. He does look serious about your relation.
Well theres two pictures one of me discretely taking of my bra off but still wearing a shirt and the other one is me bending down to pick up clothes from the floor, they sound bad but there really not. The thing is this guy and his friends take pictures of the girls they hook up with and put them in their chat group but my pictures never made it there. That's why I still kinda have hope. But you are all right, I have to tell him I know about the pictures and find out what the deal is with them or else I'll never know. Seriously thank you for all for taking your time to give me advice it really helped, I'll let you guys know how it goes this Saturday.