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What to choose

Posted by
on Mar 28 2014 at 05:13
Member since: 28 March 2014
Education advice I am 18 years old girl from India, After finishing 10th standard,my dad choosed pure science for me,I told him that I am interested in Arts..Not science..but he didnt listen to me,after just 1 year I failed in Physics and mathematics. Then my dad took me to a diploma Engineering college and I got admitted there.. I am always scared of Physics and Maths.. He did not listen to me this time too..all he said 'You can do it'.. I was so scared..in the 1st semester exam again I failed in Physics and Mathematics.. I forgot to mention 1 thing I got the highest marks in 'English and Bengali'.. Teachers told me in school that I should take arts coz m good at that...and now I am a failure person again.. My dad scolds me everyday..and mom too..I cant take it anymore..I wanted to study with the 'Arts' subjects and had a dream to work with the N.G.O.... Wanted to study in social works.. Everything messed up... Now he wants me to get married coz m a failure :-( I am thinking of escaping from my home.. Lets see

What to choose

Reply from
on Mar 28 2014 at 05:52
Member since: 28 March 2014
Hello Cami!

I am sorry to hear about your problems with your parents regarding your studies, but please dont think of running away from your home, besides being dangerous, that will also not solve the problem.

I noticed the use of the word "failure" quite often in your post, but I do not think you have failed at all! You may not be very strong in Physics and Mathematics, but from what you said, you seems to be very confident in Arts, and from the way you write, I can tell you know very well your direction.

I would suggest that you have a heart to heart talk with your parents, let them know where your passion is. I understand this may not be an easy task, as your parents seems to be the strict type who will plan your studies route for you, it will not be easy to simply tell them you want to study Arts, but the good thing I see in this is, at least they care for you - there are parents out there who does not care whether their daughter study at all.

Is it possible for you to confide in anyone with authority (teachers or counselors) in your school? Let them talk to your parents for you.

Good luck, dont give up hope!

What to choose

Reply from
on Mar 28 2014 at 07:05
Member since: 24 April 2014
Dear Cami, please don't run away from home. It will only increase your problems and please do not get married either. You are NOT a failure. A failure is a person who is not good at anything. You are excellent at languages.

Your parents are under societal pressure. It is not that they don't love you. Just like you have dreams of NGO, they too have dreams of a bright future for you. It is wrong of your father to force you into a subject which you are scared of. Have you watched the film 3 ediots? Try to convince your parents like that (like the character Farhan). Try to tell them that you would like to do arts and become a lecturer. (Perhaps your parents would not agree for NGO). What you actually want to become after you complete your studies can be decided later on.

If you can't go back and study arts...no issue. There are many other courses girls can do. You can take up a course in nutrition, jewellery making, interior decoration etc.

Please don't get married at this stage. You will only carry the tag of failure into your marriage too. First lets concentrate on removing that tag.

If you would like to write to me you can email me on shivangisanghvi at gmail dot com.

What to choose

Reply from
on Mar 28 2014 at 17:49
Member since: 27 December 2013
You need to bring in an educational counselor to talk to your folks. Do an apptitue test. It will probably show that you are not gifted in those thins required for an engineer, but are gifted in social courses.

Perhaps you should work for a while and see exactly what your want to do with your life. Or do volunteer work with children or art museum.

Do not let your parents force you into a marriage because you are not doing well in school.

You want to be a modern woman with a career that you love - make that happen.

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