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Need advice.... Help!!!

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Hello all, My story is a long one but I would really appreciate advice and opinions. Thank you all in advance. My boyfriend/father of my son and I have been in an on and off relationship since 2009. In June 2011 I gave birth to our son. We lived in separate homes at the time but still continued to date off and on. Early 2013 he decided he wanted to try dating others. He went on a few dates with a gal and he claims they only kissed. I got over it. In April 2013 we found out I was pregnant again but the pregnancy came to an end mid May. We both promised to do therapy and try to work things out or move on. By the end of May he was arguing with me over nothing and made me leave his house. I was suspicious so I went to his house later that night when I couldn't get a hold of him and found him doing drugs (cocaine) and glued to porn. This has been an issue throughout the relationship. I completely lost it and hit him took my son's belongings and threatened to take my son away. 2 days later he reported me to the police. I went to jail and ow have a trespassing charge, 2 years probation, and domestic violence classes. During court I was not allowed to contact him. He would send me mean messages and pictures of him and other girls. After 3 months I decided to try to date. I started dating someone. I ended up sleeping with the guy but decided within a few months this guy wasn't really what I was looking for. I compared him to my ex and missed him. When my ex and I were able to talk again we decided that we both had missed each other and had learned in the time away we both wanted to be together for a lifetime. When he found out I had slept with another guy he was heartbroken. Which is understandable. We have spent the last 4 months together. He bought me a promise ring and then took it back. He has now made me leave stating I'm a and I can't be forgiven for my disgusting behavior.  I am having a hard time with this. Was I really that disgusting with my behavior? Is it really not possible for him to forgive me? Is he just using this as an excuse?

Need advice.... Help!!!

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Hi Fate, It seems that you have a very rocky relationship, and that both of you do not seem to be very ready to settle down. Both of you agreed to go for therapy, that sounds promising, but what happens later on is very extreme, while I do not think violence can solve any problems, but given the circumstances, it is understandable why you snapped. It is also very immature of him to send you mean messages and photos of him with other girls, this probably made you disappointed to the extent you decided to try a new relationship, though it did not work out. Is he willing to quit the drugs? It is extremely difficult to be in a relationship with a drug addict, which I am sure you already know. You are not disgusting, you were not together with him when you dated the other guy and did what you did, so that is not betrayal, but this could be something he may not get over with for a very long time, please be prepared, I would assume that it is not that he cannot forgive you, but he can not forget. Would he be so spiteful to buy a promise ring, only to take it back and make you leave later on? Only you know for sure. It could be that he still have feelings for you, but is unable to get over the fact of what you did, but as I said, you were not together back then, so there is no point to blame yourself, if both of you still got the feelings, and that he is willing to quit the drugs and go clean, then make it a point to him that both of you will start afresh - let him know that he had dated other girls before too, whether or not anything happened is up to you to trust him, and that you were honest enough to tell him what you did, and that both of you should start a new life, forget the past, do whatever it takes to stand together, therapy would be helpful. Otherwise, you may have to give him time to get over it, and to consider the relationship. Commitment is important to sustain, and it takes the effort of both sides. I hope everything goes well for you.

Need advice.... Help!!!

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There is a child here and you don't even discuss him. . . . odd. Who has custody of this child now? Look, this guy is NOT good for you, but you are not emotionally mature enough to see it. So you continue to do this "dance" with him. Continue with your classes, practice BIRTH CONTROL, and try to figure out how this is a dead end street with this guy. Because you are just not seeing the whole picture.

Need advice.... Help!!!

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I know this is going to be a mountain to get passed ...... but it is not Read your post and you will see that both of you never had a real relationship.... It is destructive and not healthy ..... please turn away from him he is dangerous and will ruin your life like he is doing already...... Why are you expecting him to be someone else...... You put up with scraps from the beginning, on and off ( what is that even) at the start then you have a kid and live separately.... then ah sure lets date others !!!!!! Face facts you are bad for one another,,,, you cannot fit a circle in a square hole...... its done with him broken and never to be fixed...... Focus on you and your child...... put all your energy into them...... He has absolutely no respect in the world for you..... zero!!!! Get help somewhere proper because this is a mess.......

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