I could really use for the guy I'm so in love with.. I'm hurting
Last night he was out with his friends and i was home. He called me when he was finished hanging out with his friends but my phone was on silent and i was sleeping. I forgot that my phone was on silent before I had fallen asleep. He called em multiple times, but i didn't see his calls until i woke up the next morning. This morning I texted him saying that my phone was on silent, which he assumed, and that i was very sorry. So, earlier today i asked him what he was doing later on in the day and he didn't respond to my text then i called him and he didn't answer. so, i sent him a text about an hour later asking why he was ignoring me and he responded saying he's isn't ignoring me and he doesn't know what he's doing later. So then i texted back asking him to return my phone call since he isn't ignoring me. He didn't respond to that text or call me back.
Last night around 1:00 am, he texted saying "is your phone still on silent?" after ignoring my phone call early in the afternoon. I responded by saying "grow up man."
He called me last night, and we spoke and he basically doesn't believe why my phone was on silent. He has major trust issues and i know that. We've been dating for a little over 2 years now and I love him very much, and the feeling is mutual. I told him that these problems are not me and its him. that he has trust issues. We decided at the end of the call that its best for us to probably not continue dating but after the call i felt that i was acting off emotion and not thinking through my comments before saying them. I called him back later in the night, but he didn't' answer, so I wrote him a letter explaining that we have to work through his trust issues, well he has to, and I can't do little things like have my phone on silent knowing that he has these issues, and eventually they will fade. I let him know that if we're really in love with each other then we could work thru this. I left the letter on his car this morning, which is something we do with each other, explaining my feelings but i'm still hurting right now. I won't call him again and i'll see if he calls me after reading the letter.
I still haven't heard from him
He's 26 years old and i'm 24.
what to do in this situation?
Think of a couple who does not have misunderstanding, atleast one? I don't think there exist such couple. My parents argue, so does my neighbours, so does all. The problem with relationships (what I think) is ego. Yeah that is his problem, why should I ask sorry?, why should I message him? why should I call him?
I don't advice you say sorry and all. But you should try to adjust. Atleast one should advice in any relationship till it gets much more closer. This is problem with most marriages also, they are breaking after a small misunderstanding. I have seen my mother shouting at my father for simple reasons, my father does not talk that time. After a day or two, he slowly talks to her and changes her opinion and makes her understand. They are the sweetest couple I have ever seen not because they have less misunderstanding but because they way deal with it.
But we cannot compare relationships, each one is a different one. So I suggest you talk to him and slowly tell him how you feel about his actions and thinking. If at all you try and things won't work out, then forget him and move on.
PS: I am not a professional in relationships but I have few good relationships with my friends and love.
Well thank god I am single!!!
Hi I don't think you should contact him. You have said your piece. Let him contact you .
I think it is rather childish that you have to explain the whole phone thing..... it is not good to be holding onto negatives and grudges like that.... based on shit in his head ..... or whatever ..
How long are going to entertain this for.... it is a game ..... Where is the growth here?
Ask yourself how does this relationship meet your needs? Do you know what they are.... because relationships like this can blur what your needs are and after a while you are so busy trying to please or explain yourself, you lost a few years....
You are supposed to be on his beck and call 24/7?
Then he pouts when you aren't. And gets passive-aggressive with you.
Get away from this child/man.
So he still loves you and you still love him... That can be established. How often do you compliment him? Just out of curiosity... A lot of guys show that they're insecure in strange ways, and that's one way of showing it. He knows that there are other guys better then him out there, more handsome, better in bed, etc, but let him know why you chose him over all those other guys.
This relationship will be continuous work for you if you go on. Having to manage all such small small issues screaming for trust. How long can you do it and how many times? It will take him many number of years to get a control over his trust. Are you willing to put in so much of energy, so much of work all the while handling your hurt alone? Think twice.