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Husband is emotionally distant

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hi.I am a 26.I married 3 years back to a man who was already married against the will of my family.We have a kid now.I was never contended with my relationship.I always felt something missing.I always loved my husband and was extremely disappointed by his behaviour.He was not at all emotionally attached to me and i was so much.He is very much obsessed with females.He used to stare and comment on females in front of me.I told him many times that i dont like it but he didn't care.I always felt as if we are living separate lives and we are not family.He used to watch amateur sex videos and then think about them while in bed.He used to share his sex fantasies threesome,wife swap,orgy etc.And convinced me to help him fulfilling his fantasies.Told me to search for a guy for threesome and see his cock.He made me think this way and Now he is angry coz i talked to a man on internet and i saw him on cam.I didnt show him myself and i even didnt let him hear me.He doesnot trust me now and treats me very badly.He has left the country.He is ready to support me financially but he doesnot talk to me.I want a emotional relationship.I want someone who loves me That someone should be my husband ofcourse.I have asked for forgiveness but he says he wont open his heart for me again.He says that He will take me abroad after one and a half year and then i will have a whole new world to choose my ways.I am so confused.I cant take divorce and also i cant live this way.HE always tells me that he will marry again.I have ruined my life by myself.

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