Girlfriend loves me but likes another guy
Hi, I've been dating this girl for over 2 years now. We were really in love and happy together. There was the occasional bickering and emotional stuff from time to time, but nothing we didn't handle well. Recently she told me (after having it on her chest for awhile, had to coax it out of her) that shes had crushes on other guys. I wasn't too concerned, i thought it was just an issue of hormones and stuff like that. Just today though she's admitted she still has a crush on one particular guy, I'll call him James. In a conversation today, she even mentioned that James was "perfect". However right after that when she saw the concern on my face she quickly was saying that she doesn't like him, she still loves me, she thinks James is interested in someone else, etc, she wants them to be happy. As far as I know, she has had not any physical relations with him, and he doesn't seem into her. However, as I'm sure you can understand, I'm really concerned about this and hurt. I've helped A LOT of people before, and this could lead down a dark dark road, and those who don't know my girlfriend would say to back out now, leave before she hurts you. However, she still seems extremely into me, and seemed to get extremely depressed at the thought of us breaking up. Evidence still seems to say that she cares a lot for me, and still loves me. She's never asked to go and be alone with him, or in specific hang out with him. I plan to question her more later today, but what is the best way to go about this? Do you think I should break up with her, or am I over-thinking this? Help would be most appreciated, thank you for your time.
If she's really in love with you, she won't look elsewhere. She wouldn't have the need to and she certainly wouldn't let it interfere with your relationship if she was happy and secure.
That fact that she's had in on her chest for awhile and you had to coax it out, basically says it all.
After two years, no wonder you're feeling concerned and hurt. Think about the whole scenario rather than worrying about over thinking the 'James' issue.
Hi paradox to be honest with you I know how she feels. Don't take it to seriously I have been in a year relationship now with my boyfriend and there are times I feel like I have crushes on other people. I have never came out and told him. I think i just get these crushes just to have some sort of excitement. Girls have a need to want what they cant have. Personally i think its a way of wanting more attention from my boyfriend , if your lacking in that i would try paying more attention to her. Good luck