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Am I kidding myself???

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Emotional advice I have had feelings for my best friend for over a year now, i've managed to keep them hidden i think until one night a few weeks ago when we were both drunk, we ended up kissing. As i'm overweight and to me at least he is one of the well fit people in the world, i asked if the kissing was a serious case of beer goggles. His response was it should never have happened as he still loves his wife. His wife split from him 5 months before. Since then there has been another eveing when we have had a small kiss, then last week we did a bit more kissing, i was supposed to be staying the night on the sofa, instead he asked me to stay in bed with him. He said he didn't want to have sex with me but that didn't matter to me at the time i was just happy to be able to get in bed with him and snuggle up to him all night. He stripped down to his pants and got into bed. I left all my cothes on and joined him. I layed behind him all night with my arm gently laid over him (spooning i suppose). On friday this week i was talking to his housemate and he told me my friend made it really clear we had not had sex and semed a bit disgusted at the thought of it. I just really kind of wanted to know if this sounds like he's using me to make himself feel a bit better, boost his ego so to speak. We work together so i'm really hoping this isn't the case as if he is using me and doesn't really like me in that way then i think i need to keep my distance for a while so i can get over him, but we see each other every day at work so this will be really hard. Does anyone have any ideas?

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