How to get back together with a girl?
1 year ago I met a girl at a friend's party, we didn't talk to each other and didn't even talk with the same people. We just noticed each other. She added me on facebook the next day and I started talking to her because she is pretty and I wanted to know her better, while talking to her I actually started to really like her. I am really shy so I didn't dare to ask her out but after a lot of talking to each other she asked me out. We went on 2 dates after that and I started to love her. The only problem was that she talked non-stop to me via whatsapp, while I normally never talk to anyone on whatsapp except for school or work. So she started to get annoying via whatsapp, because I didn't talk as much as her on whatsapp she asked me if I still liked her, i said "no", partly because I was annoyed by the whatsapp conversations and partly because I was shy and didn't dare to kiss her or even hold her hand. I regret this decision. I still liked her a lot but we stopped talking to each other. While we were dating she started working at the same place as me so she became a part of our group of friends, we never really talked when going out with that group, only a few words.
A while after I rejected her she started talking to me again, and said she missed the times we had together. Even though I still loved her I said it was all probably for the best. (I have no idea why i said that and I regret it) I broke her heart again and she had a tough time getting over me.
A week ago i finally had the guts to start talking to her again (whatsapp) and I told her I still had feelings for her. She was confused and said she didn't know what to do because I hurt her feelings more than once and she didn't want me to back off again and hurt her again. We kept talking and she said she sometimes felt she still had feelings for me too. She wasn't sure about how she felt about me now.
Yesterday we were drinking with our group and she started to talk to me again, it felt really good and it made my feelings even stronger.
But now I don't know what I should do next. Should I ask her out? Should I give her more time to think about it?
I hope I can get some help. Thank you.
I would take it really slow this time and try to open up a little more.
Let her know how you feel because so far its seems you are playing with her emotions....and im not even sure you know how you feel. Thats why you should take it slow. Atleast 4 to 6 months of pure friendship..being in a relationship isnt a game and it only gets more searious.
Feelings are involved and they can be seariously damaged if the back and forth continues and before you know it you wont have a chance anymore. It seems like she likes you alot because she keeps coming back....so take it slow it make sure this is really what you want!
Thank you for your answer.
I think I do know how I feel, I feel like this for a few months already and first I thought it was just jaleousy and I should just wait for it to go over but I still feel the same way for months now.
Also we were joking around a bit about another guy asking her out and she said: "I'd rather go out with you, like we used to". I'm not sure if that's a hint or if she said that as a joke.
The joke you guys shared about the other guy and her rather going out with you maybe the truth but you cant live for others....let her know you like her but right now you rather be friends so noone gets hurt. She has to understand that and you have to take time to know for sure what you want.
Confronting the problem head on is something i would submit. So in this case i would explain to her, everything you just explained to us. tell it how it is. Then let it be and let her decide. To be honest you have taken that choice away from yourself by telling her no then getting back with her twice. Though not intended it could be misconstrued as "playing games." so she has to decide now. But honesty is your best bet