Break up after 5 yrs
So I'm 25 and have been with my girl for nearly 5 yrs. We lived together for 4 yrs and were engaged for 1 yr. About 3 months ago i found out she was seeing this other guy from work. I found this out thru text on her phone. Anyway, that was just a fling and didn't last long. But now we moved out of our apt and both moved back home to our parents for the meantime. We're from the same town. During our last wk in the apt we slept together every night and what not just like old times. She's said she's sorry i dk how many times for breaking my heart. I loved this.girl to death and still do. I forgave her for what she did to me cuz i am one who gives second chances, plus i still love her very strongly. But when i ask her about us she usually has nothing to say and I'm the one talking. She has always felt out of place around my family, even tho they have always liked her. She says she messed up with that guy but that wasn't the real reason. She hasn't made the last 4 or 5 family events before this happened too. She purposely missed the last 2 and used work as an excuse. She has always made this a huge deal and says it will never be the same with us cuz of how she feels around them. Also, when she cheated, my family lashed out at her so now it would be even more awkward if we were to get back together and she.was to be around my family. I told her that me and her are what's most important, NOT my family. She agrees but says it would still be too hard. I get nowhere with her on this topic. So we've been hanging out off and on for these last couple months but the last wk has been especially hard cuz we're not living together anymore. It's been driving me nuts cuz I'm so used to having her around every single day. Two days ago, we got together and went for a walk. I told her that i had some things on my mind but was really scared to say them. I finally told her that i feel like ending it. We sat in her car and cried for almost 2 hrs trying to say good bye. But then we met up later that night again. And again last night i went over to see her like an idiot. I love her with all i got and she keeps saying she's sorry she's putting me thru all this. But she can't just come out and say she wants to really try and wants to be with me forever. That's what i've been waiting for her to say! But she says she thinks our break up is for the best and that I'll find some other girl who'll make me really happy. But i don't want this. I still want her. I know i need to start ignoring her but it's very difficult for me. She says she is having a hard time with this too. Ugh, what do i do?
Breaking up is hard to do (like the song says) and you two are going thru this right now.
She has been honest with you but she still will not say the words that you want to hear, so believe her that she is not going to commit to you.
It will take time, but, yes - she needs to be let go. And you need to accept it.
It will take time. Let her go. If you really think about it, you will find reasons why it just is not working.
I truly understand how you're feeling, I'm trying to end my 5 year relationship. I found out 2 yrs ago that my bf cheated, I was devasted, but after a while I forgave him and tried to move forward. It worked for a while, but since I really didn't trust him and he hadn't changed his ways I was always sceptical. Then just a few days ago I found out he was getting together with a woman from work. Take my advice, it will not stop. Save yourself a lot of heartache and end it now. The feelings won't end over night...I still love him too, but I love myself more. It will get easier with time.