I no longer love my husband and have fallen in love with a friend of mine
i have been married for 7 years but realised 3 years ago that i still loved my ex and got married for the wrong reasons. we were supposed to be making plans to be together but as usual he ran for the hills wen things started getting hot. he was very angry cause i refused to have an affair with him and told him he would have to wait till my divorce was thru. eventually we lost contact and i tried by all means to try to at least keep him inmy life as a friend but he just ignored me and caried on with his life. i was extremely hurt and decided to try make my marriage work. (my husband was unaware of all my ex issues).
i was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety for over 6 years and recently diagnosed bipolar. that was a major blow for me but it really opened my eyes. i found that i do not love my husband anymore and that i feel trapped. we both come from different worlds and he was extremely emotionally abusive over the years. i told him recently that i want a divorce and he cried and promised to be the man i fell inn love with. he has been tryin his best but i just cannot open up to him.
i have fallen in love with a close friend of mine who has been there for me over the years everytime my husband would break me down he was there to make me feel special. we never have had anything more than friendship between us but i have recently told him how i feel and he promised that he would wait for me.
i am on a mission to reinvent and find myself again. i do not like the person ihave become cause of this relationship.he gossips more than a old lady and forever has issues with people and because i have tried to keep him happy i have pushed many people out of my life. i live the life of a hermit in this marriage and there are many values in our lives that we differ on and his values are wat i want to protect my children from. he is ignorant and uneducated and i tried to motivate him but he is so much of a mammas boy that i cant get him to build any ambition unless his mom had to tell him to do so. i once tried to get him to go write the tests needed to have his qualifications on paper and his mother told him that he must be happy with the half a loaf that the Lord gives him.
i am tired and want out and am at a loss at how i am gonna break the news to him and then go thru with just walking away... i have discovered recently that i am a majorly big softy and that is why i am forever getting hurt and am not able to stand up for myself against those that are continuously hurting me...
If you're on a mission to reinvent yourself then you need to walk away from your failed marriage of 7 years. You don't need the man you have fallen in love with; you need to do it yourself because you can't be happy with anyone else until you are well and truly over your immature and controlling husband ...and your ex.
You can, however, rely on your friend's support until you are ready for another serious relationship. If you really need to find your happiness which will eventually negate your depression, then you have no choice but to make the decision to move on.
Once you do this, you will have new found strength to stand up for yourself and prevent other people from dragging you down to their level. You need to ensure that your values and standards are shared with whoever is in your life. Most importantly, if you have children or plan to have children in the future, then you need to be happy, content and healthy for them.
Don't waste the true person you really are.
My Ex is having similar issue with her husband. Divorce is what you need. Don't hide ur feelings. If you are scared of telling him in person. Tell him u wana travel and then break the news for him and that will be the end of it. You not coming back to his house again.
Please don't do a phone break up as advised here. You have been married for 7 years you need to do this in person. Understand that you have been emotionally unfaithful to him already and it is time to move on. You do not want the face to face confrontation, the tears, the pain on his behalf but Im sure if he knew that you wanted another person and in fact in the past had wanted another person he would be hurt just the same. You need to do the hard thing and let him know that you want out and then take his tears and hurt and know that this is a part of having a long relationship that is now at an end.
I commend you for not having an affair. I don't think they are health for any party involved and cause more pain then pleasure. If you are unhappy then that is not fair to you, and staying with a person even though you do not love them in unfair to them.
It will be hard but no one ever said relationships were easy. Things that take effort are often worth having. Good luck
discover the power of a praying woman/ wife
seek divine intervention. pray I say n do repent for ua sake n ua husband