My boyfriend left me 5 weeks ago
i met my boyfriend through his step mother who is married to his dad. we were very good friends and we hung out all the time she always wanted me & my BF to get together so about 6 months after i met her he & i got together. i am 42 he is 37. We were together for 6 months we lived together for 3 months in those short months we became pregnant which was a total shock to me as i never wanted children but we decided to have the baby neither of us has kids.he moved in with me & we got along so great he isthe love of y life & i know he felt the same for me. we started to look at homes to buy and we were all a happy family. The step mom puts on a charity event every year & i got my work to donate 10k to the event the event took place on June 8,2014 but on June 3,2014 i lost our baby girl she died inside of me & on that same day i found about her my Foster Father died. This is where it get's very hard i never told my friend or my BF about my child hood growing up in Foster Care & the abuse my sisters and i suffered i never said that i was estranged from my real father & have not spoken to him for years i glorified this great relationship with this man but in my heart i was speaking of my Foster Dad and Foster Mom who saved my sisters and i when i was 10 years old after 5 years of being brutally abused in another foster home. i lied yes i lied and hid the truth from everyone cause i was so ashamed of my past and worked hard to let my child hood go. I am a good person i never take anything from anyone i never hurt these people at all. But when the charity came my work said they could not donate the funds until November 2014 she kept bugging me for the money so i said i would donate it myself big mistake. But the more i thought about it the more i knew i could not so i asked my boyfriend to talk to her he assured me he would and that we would be ok. On june 14th a week after the charity event after he spent a day with his step mom and dad he came home was a different person and when i went out i came back he was gone all his stuff have not heard from him since. However i know she wanted to hurt me she tore us apart because of the charity and the $10k she wanted to hurt me and knew that would. I ended up getting in a fight with her a verbal fight via text she said that i was never pregnant and my father never died & how terrible i was. i told her she was crazy, fast forward two weeks later she called my work my friends dug into my life and yes they located my real father and spoke with him he said that i was married twice not true i was married once for 20 years, he said i stole a car not true, he said i am a liar and a terrible person he said many many terrible things to them. they are all lies my real father knows nothing of my life he has no idea who i am. later that day her husband left me a message said we spoke to your dead dad we know what you are all about stay away from my family or you will pay the consequences, they do not know the real truth because he never told them that. I had to get the police involved with my real father. the problem is my BF believes all that was said he will not contact me to ask my side or anything and icant cotnact him i am not sure what to do at this time i am so hurt and just want my truth out there. please help me
First.. deep breath and remember what's meant to be will be. Second...learn lessons...if they were checking out things, they already didn't trust you...bottom line, you did not give them all the gross details of your past, you said you did lie too to cover up it...your not the only one who does...the fact that he acts and his family does too..like they are better than you...you are really better off without them. They have no right to play judge/jury/God and convict you. I believe if he was really about love he would not be looking for a reason to end it. People tend to run when scared or look for reasons to get out...give it time to see. In other words, one door shuts another one opens..if he truly loves you, he will forgive these little things and communicate right. I at this point would be happy in did not lead to more since he seems to be a coward and ran without communicating properly...wtf, when you just lost his baby and hurting enough...honey you have been abused long enough, learn that no matter what you do...you have the right to explain yourself and be heard, if they don't wish to listen to you, than you must be kind enough to self to know you are better alone until the right person who wishes to have those painful things erased from your future and not give you more pain, he isn't any better than your real father who has caused you pain, he is causing you pain and you are now an adult so you can stop the pain by saying yes I was wrong and will learn before moving in...first not so quickly and secondly, here is what you need to know about me and my life and either they stay or they go...the ones that judge you are better off gone...you cant lose what you didn't have...you did not have a really good man who would be there for you in good times and in bad in sickness and in health...remember that! best all! love yourself!
Can you move - I mean physically move your living place? Get in the car and leave? Move to another place?
You need to get away from ALL of these people. They toxic to you, emotionally and spiritually.
Your BF has this sick network as a support system and he will not betray them, so don't expect anything from him. This family unit is very sick.
You are an adult now. You can choose which people you want to "parent" you and you can become distant to any other people.
Make better choices of who you allow to be around you.