PeoplesProblems Logo

I'm in love with my best friend

Default profile image
I am 23 years old and have been friends with my guy best friend for over 6 years. I am normally not the type of girl to have feelings, I prefer to keep things casual. After college we both moved back home and started hanging out more. Things started to become a little intense. We text all day, non stop and all night almost everyday of the week. When we hang out we cuddle under the same blanket and he nudges my arm and rests his legs right next to mine. He has played with my hair and commented on my laugh, saying that he likes it. We have another female friend that he has known for even longer that he is not this touchy-feely with or as close. Now my best friend is shy, and lacks confidence. He is only ever had one girl friend before, way back in high school and I am much more experienced, which he knows. Despite this I love him, I have always loved his personality but it has recently turned into a physical attraction too. I finally broke down and told him how I was feeling. He kept giving me the line of "not wanting to ruin our friendship" and that he wont let himself even think about me in that way because I am the most important person to him in his world and he knows that he would do something to mess it up and lose me as a friend. I tried to explain to him that this was silly and that we make sense, and that I could never hate him. This boy sees only good in me and doesn't recognize it in himself, which kills me. But still he insists that he does not have feelings for me in that way. I know this sounds silly, but giving everything else, and the circumstances surrounding it I still do not believe he does not want something more between us. He cried when I told him that I didn't think I could be friends with him anymore because it was too painful and confusing. Of course I do not want to end the friendship because I value him but despite him clearly saying no, I have been driving myself crazy wondering every time I see him what I can do to convince him that trying to date would not be a mistake. I guess my question is what do you think? Do you think he really does not have feelings for me, or that he is too scared to admit to me and maybe even himself? In either case, what should I do?

I'm in love with my best friend

Default profile image
SIX YEARS you are cuddling with this guy and he wants to be just friends? All this time, he hasn't made a move on you? Are you sure he is "available"? He may be gay. Check it out.

I'm in love with my best friend

Default profile image
He told you he does not want to have a relationship with you. You have given him multiple opportunities to have something more with you and he has chosen not to. If you want to keep this friendship then tell him he needs to stop being so physical with you and spent less time together. You are making a lot of excuses and trying to persuade yourself that what he is saying is not what he is meaning but I think he is telling you the truth. He doesn't want a relationship with you.

This thread has expired - why not start your own?

B-3