When she comes up with excuses why YOU (her fiancee and father of her child) can't contact her 9 times out 10, then something is wrong.
You need to get her to explain and discuss with you honestly, just what is really happening particularly when all of her odd behavior has happened together.
Something does not seem right here. She does not nag you about housework, has put more effort into her appearance, is not being intimate, is distant..All red flag signals.
You have tried talking to her but things have not improved. I guess now you just need a bit more evidence as to what lies behind this change.
This struck me, though: "she dosent even nag anymore about helping with house work (i do do it by the way)".
If you do do it then where would be the need to nag? Error - Does Not Compute. So shall we be honest and admit that you've however recently acquiesced in order to gain back her attention yet it's proving too little too late because your past/prior failure to respond [a] at all or [b] in timely fashion was allowed to persevere whereby the love (her sense that she and her feelings were your priority) got kicked bit by bit out of her until this, now, is the result?
Is someone on "Love-Me"-Book making her feel more like a worthwhile woman or has she simply turned her attentions platonically to life outside of yours and her cave? Some women latch onto other woman and for aspirational reasons start to 'compete' with them in terms of physical appearance and lifestyle. In other words, a self-serving.
If your efforts are too little, too late, then you're going to have to conquer the latter syndrome by pulling out the BIG guns (bouquets). Because it's no good being taken away for romantic weekends if the person doing the taking away has proven systematically for too long that he's an uncaring wotsit/puts you second/third, whereby even with new improvements you can't catch up fast enough in adjusting your perception of him. Shock therapy of the positive variety.
If you have an 18 month child then to all intents and purposes, YOU'RE MARRIED...certainly emotionally and practically if not legally/societally. So why on earth you're still fiancees beats me. Why not reposition that cart and horse? Maybe deeper down THAT'S the big gun that's for too long been withheld, meaning all the small stuff like helping with housework (which you shouldn't technically even be doing if only you work outside the home) is just taking the brunt of the blame? Maybe she simply has too much self-respect to say to you, 'You should have married me already!' and instead is trying to (somewhat justifiably) manipulate you with her feet?
Food for thought? I mean, you must KNOW this is the crux or otherwise, instead of having typed 'I have been with my fiancée for 3 and a half years we have a 18 month child', you could more easily have put it thus: 'I have been with my partner for 3 and a half years we have a 18 month child'.
See what I see now?
PROPOSE. ...or forever hold your 'piece'.
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