I have re connected with a person I was in love with in high school. We are planning a life together after he retires. We live in different states. He will be retiring soon. The problem is he still lives with his wife. I have told him that its the wrong thing to do, but he says he will stay with her until he retires. Now in the next week we are planning a road trip to visit a city to see if we want to live there. I don't know what to do, it just hurts so much that he does this, I don't understand it.
You are not thinking clearly. You are just a mistress if you have anything to do with him right now. If he means it, he'll contact you after he retires and is completely divorced. Love doesn't excuse wrong behavior.
Oh that is rough.......
How long have you two been together?
When does he retire?
It does seem very confusing. If you two are looking at a place
to be together it seems it might be serious.
I'd prepare for heartbreak just in case......
What do you mean he "lives" with his wife?
Is he divorced? Does she know about you? Are there children involved?
How is it that you made these mature-years plans with a man who has such baggage? He really has no right to make these kinds of plans at the place he is now.
Hi you are in a tough position. You are giving yourself the chance of half a life with this man. If he cannot step out and be with you 100 percent what s he scared of?
I would advise you to step back from this for you.
Get things clear in your head and start planning YOUR future, pleasing yourself from now on. My point being that, he seems to please himself,while your life is on hold. You create your home for you, f he or anyone else wants to join you well and good.
Remember who you are..... you are a person with value,start putting all your energies back into you,before you lose who you are.
Are both of you looking back to an earlier life and stuck in the past?
Look after yourself...
He has said for me to trust him, he has a plan and so I am going to trust him. This trip we're going on is a huge step.