I have been seeing a guy for about 8 months now, out of which three months were great and then everything got ruined as his ex girlfriend popped up - respectively messed him up when she pleaded to meet him but eventually wouldn't show up and ignored him after that, which led to him being upset and refusing to speak to me for some time. Although we seemed to have got over it and he said she has hurt him too much and he wouldn't want to see her again, our relationship got never the same as it was before. I started facing his crazy mood swings when for a week he would be sweet to me and suddenly he wouldn't want to see me and would cancel our date. His explanation for that was stress with work and bad financial situation. Sometimes he took his stress out on me on which I few times couldn't hold myself and broke up with him, but he has always come back to me after few days with apologies.
Since the past few weeks he has got a new job which is apparently very demanding and he says he has got an opportunity he had been waiting for 10 years and that he has to give it his best. So he tells me now he wont be able to see me for weeks. We live in the same city, my college is just fifteen minutes of walk from his office. And no matter how hard or lightly I try, it has become impossible to meet him and our communication is not so good and we keep fighting. I am wondering if someone can really be this busy so he cant take out a bit of time for a girl he claims to like. But when we actually happen to meet, our time together is just perfect, he seems to be enjoying it and so do I.
I know he doesn't love me, but he really likes me and in those 8 months we have been through quite a lot together. I stood by him in all good and bad, always trying to support him. We used to meet twice a week which was okay. Now it is once in two, three weeks and I have a feeling it is somehow fading, that something is wrong on his side. May he have an affair with someone, maybe that ex from the past? Our relationship is not the most serious one, but I told him I wouldn't fancy if he slept with somebody else and he accepted it. But now it all feels weird, sometimes as if we weren't together at all. Minimum of his initiative to contact me and minimum of affection is really confusing me.
It really is hurting me a lot and I'd like to talk about things and make compromises, but he says his job is a priority. I really dont know. Should I be patient and wait for his situation to change? Should I better let him go or what? Speaking to him in person is not really possible and I dont want to solve it via texting. What do I do? I dont want to be wrong to him, but at the same time I dont want to be strung along.
I can tell from your post that you certainly like him more then he does you. If he says his jobs more important just stop lying to yourself you've developed feelings for this guy and he doesn't feel the same way about you it's blatantly obvious he could meet you sometime during the week since he's only15mins away. If you have any sense of self respect stop seeing this person he has you wrapped around his finger and he knows this he knows you'll come running back at a moments notice whenever he needs you or feels like it but won't make the effort for when you need him. You've given him more then he's giving back stop being blind more then likely he's trying to get back with his ex or thinking about her and not trying to mess things up with her by seeing you your just the "side girl" sorry to put it bluntly
Wow - all the signs are there for you to let this guy fade away. In fact, that's what he has been trying to do all along.
Trust your instincts on this one. You even said:
"sometimes as if we weren't together at all. Minimum of his initiative to contact me and minimum of affection is really confusing me."
You really do deserve better. Keep saying that to yourself.