Hi i recently went to a Gay Bar about a month ago ( to which none of us are Gay) with Some freinds, to cut a long story short i met a girl who 21, and Im 28, her mate liked me but considering Im straight he introduced me to her! So next weekend Was my bday, i invited her out of politeness to which my surprise she offered to come, " bit strange meeting a load of blokes i thought, anyway she paid for me and my mates drinks most of night again a bit strange..towards ending are ok night she says" dont live far from here do you" so We continue walking to mine Where i agreed she could stay , and she Was very adament Nothing Was going to happen to which Was true. " We continued talking, and she Was telling me that " she thinks Im a Really nice guy, too good looking and muscular for her, and that shes lucky she Found me! Obviously i Thought Maybe ive got a decent one here, but continues to tell me that " her mum doesnt like her that much, and she has a history of fighting men, and that Also she cannot Wait to move away from home to which her Gay uncle and mum live" bit much on a second introduction i Thought!" Anyway goes home, week passes with many texts, "she Was Always asking me Where i Was etc... She invites me to go hers and go out, i go , meet her and we continue to go for a meal and then shes meeting her freinds All good so i Thought, couple of freinds ask her " so you boyfreind girlfreind then she replies" no, no,no, were just freinds" very offputing" again! " one of her many male freinds then tells me "shes very vunerable, hasnt had luck with men and puts on a hard front, again potential warning signs! throughout the night We got drunk, then she started kissing and holding my hand! Great i thought but no , !! We continue to go to hers,Nothing happens , ( which Im fine with) but i felt she Was very cold, not very intimate, and if i may say slightly grumpy in the Morning.. she continues to tell me "she doesnt label relationships, things just happen, " again something ive not experienced! Again i questioned " so what are We just freinds then to which she replied We can Be"! So mixed emotions from one week me being the nicest, good looking , hot and her words " your exs loss" to me being rejected in front of her mates, very cold, and no intimacy, ( By which i mean not sex just not much kissing , cuddling, or even talking) , now it turns out she likes to drink a lot, in the week All she does is work, go home and go to bed, even stranger Was When she told me " i met a hot Guy once, but i offered to help him look for a woman as i wasnt interested , wtf!" Add to the fact when she saw me and my mates she Brought us " 3 strange blokes" drinks, and offered to take us to another Gay bar! Following this, her texts and interest seemed to dwindle, to the point of Nothing! It didnt dawn on me at first but my female colleague at work pointed that " she could Be gay, or at Best confused and muddled" seeing as Im what most woman call a good catch so to speak.. now my question is should i leave this? Or should i drop one More text? Baring in mind shes pretty, and very freindly, but seeing as shes got so much baggage, and to Be honest even my mum said " yöuve never experienced this before" just total mixed emotions and a final word that she prefers hanging aröund blokes! And stangely told me she doesnt Really care what she looks like, and cannot Be bothered to dress up.! Thanks
For starts - IMHO - seven years is a huge difference in the 20's. She hasn't found herself yet. In school? Decided on a career? doesn't care what she looks like? Hm-m-m.
Then there's the:
"By which i mean not sex just not much kissing , cuddling, or even talking"
"now it turns out she likes to drink a lot"
Put her into the "friend" zone. If you are looking for a mature woman in her late 20's, this is not the gal.
I'm with mom, "you've never experienced this before" - meaning "you don't need this in your life right now.'
I wonder why you are trying so hard to make this work. Like the challenge?
If you have to think about texting her, you clearly want to and feel like there's something there, sometimes you have to take chances, just keep your cards close to your chest and try to keep an open mind, then in other words, you won't be upset if things work out, but at least you will know.