I don't know what to do with my ex anymore
Hello, I write here because it seems I need an opinion.
More than a year ago I was with a guy (named for example X) for 3-4 months. X is a weird guy, he seems very aloof and indeed he is very quiet. We had many commons but we couldn't talk a lot and I couldn't be 100% myself sine I didn't had a lot of feedback. I went with his flow because weirdly he made me feel happy and..in love. We were talking every day, he introduced me to his friends and family and he always had something good to say to them about me. However, one day he broke up with me. He said that he had a long term relationship with someone(for 3-5 years)and since then he feels that he can't connect with someone else. So he said that he wasnt in love me with me or connected and that if time passed we could hung up...Well, I was heartbroken because I had already feelings for him. He saw me crying but I wasn't a drama queen afterwards. He contact me after some days to say happy birthday to me but I didnt contact him for a long time, just once (after four months of our break up) to inform him about the concert of his favorite band. I saw him at the concert and he was friendly but distant. We had no contact again for another four months just some minor facebook likes and maybe a random meeting at an event. After a year of the break up he started talking to me again. Not too much, but he talked to me for no reason, just to talk. We started talking a more and we even met to paint his wall together. He was jealous when someone talked to me. After two months we had met several times. I noticed his interest in me however I knew that he had a crush with someone else at the same period. So I thought that he saw me only as friend. We kept being in touch (not only through internet), but one day I saw that he was with another girl that I knew something was going on between them. I noticed he subtly hided that from me and that whole thing didnt last. One night we were watching a movie and he wanted to kiss me and well..have sex with me. I said no. We kept in touch for two more months, talking almost everyday and meeting twice a week. Two days ago..we had sex. To be honest I dont know how I feel about that. I was patient for a long time, I tried to win his interest back by balancing between interest and distance. But... I felt that nothing has changed. Its not that I cant contact him now..but... I know he is into me because we have fun together..but he isnt in love with me. The only thing that changed is the way we talk. It is more sincere and fun..and more appealing...as if the relationship between us has matured a bit. I am really exhausted. I really want to make the right moves but I am not sure if its worth it anymore.
Thanks so much for reading all this. It is do damn painful to wait someone you love to love you. I had a lot of patience and I am happy that we are in touch and that he is attracted to me again..but I feel its not the way I want and I dont know what to do.
It's seems like you've put a lot of time and effort into forming a relationship with this person and you deserve something in return. In my opinion it time to have a proper conversation to find out where both of you are and what you both want. If he's truly interested in you then he'll be willing to commit to something more serious but if all he's interested in is the odd shag then it's best that you distance yourself so you can get you feelings under control and not let him take advantage. Either way you deserve to know how he feels towards you. I hope everything turns out ok for you, and you do what's best for you x x