Is she just not into me?
So I recently made things official with my girlfriend. We have been dating for over a month and now are exclusive. Last night was the first time we had sex, well I did atleast. She made me orgasm 4x but when it came to her turn she wasn't about it. I don't understand why this is, but its really bothering me today. I felt so connected to her and today I feel like miles apart. We both feel like each other could be the one and I know I'm in love with her. This morning when she left she seemed like all was well. She says it just wasn't time for her.
Her friends have told me she's been wanting to so, I'm just totally confused.
Please help, lesbian and lost
"Last night was the first time we had sex, well I did at least."
Sex is not necessarily the same as love making. It takes time to get to know your partner and for your partner to be comfortable with you. Take her word for it. While it may have been very enjoyable, she just did not get to the big "O".
It's not always about crossing the finish line. It's about being in the race itself.
Write back in about 2 weeks.
I once had a friend tell me that when she is with a new partner it takes her months before she is able to orgasm with them. I once had a boyfriend who focused so much on whether or not I orgasmed, that it kept me from being about to ... I felt pressured and like I was under a microscope. Finally, I kind of lost my temper and told him, "Look, my orgasm is for me, not you, and it is none of your business, so stop putting pressure on me about it!"
Perhaps her focus was pleasuring you. For some people, the satisfaction they get from sex is satisfying their partner. If she didn't seem bothered about not having an orgasm, it might really be OK with her. If it was your first time, it's normal to feel nervous about it, before and after. But if, say after a few months, things are still awkward for you, talk to her about it.