Do you think friendship can turn into more? Should i cut contact with him?
There is this guy that i have been talking to for a while now and we get on so well. I feel like i have known him forever and we have shared so much with each other and feel comfortable doing so. We met up and went for dinner one particular night. A few days ago he told me he really likes me as a person, finds me incredibly attractive, but he doesn't see a relationship based off of certain things. I think i reminded him a little bit of his ex who was very self conscious and lacked confidence. He said he was concerned that i would need constant reassurance and worry in a relationship.
Unless he was breaking it to my easy, he does appear to find me attractive and i feel there is extreme sexual desire between both of us, but the issue is i feel like i am way more invested in him than he is with me obviously, although i don't know if i could ever see a relationship potential because he does seem to view things so very different to me and casually, but i do still have feelings for him.
I wondered about whether we could have a fwb type situation. He never mentioned this once to me, but due to the sexual attraction between us i wondered, but of course the other side of me thinks it is a bad move because it will probably make me like him more and when he doesn't feel the same i will feel hurt and it will probably ruin the friendship.
So my question is, do you think i am too much in the friendzone? I would love for something to develop and maybe it would change both of our behaviors. I thought it was a bit of a snap decision to decide after one date he didn't see relationship potential, and when he talks to me i can't seem to shake off the whole really liking him thing.
Another thing is that when i don't feel someone could be a potential relationship i tend to be extremely laid back. I wondered if this could possibly make him start to like me if we are just friends, and part of me hopes it could. He is such a great person, and i don't not want him in my life at all but i am wondering if there is there a way to deal with this?
Do you think cutting off all contact would be better for me? I really don't want to but i just feel more time spent with him as friends will make my feelings grow. I just feel in a bit of a dilemma. He is constantly reaching out and talking to me.
My opinion is that he was "breaking it to you easy" to use your words. I know that's probably not what you want to hear, but I think you're playing with fire to try and "win" him. He's clearly stated where he's at with it, and would probably not be okay with an fab situation because you've already talked about exclusivity after one date. (WHAT?!?)
My advise - do what you need to do so that you can actually be this guy's friend. That's what he's telling you he's able to offer. If you want more, you will probably face disappointment and hurt that you can avoid.
Also, there is no such thing as a "friend-zone" that's a place that people put themselves in when they can't accept the reality of a situation. Do yourself a favor and let the romantic (and sexual) aspects of this one go and you'll be saving yourself some unnecessary heartache.