What do to so confuised
I have recently been with someone 9 months all has been ok he use to tell me all the time i was his princess he loved me so much all the time, we had a very strained relationship as I found out my daughter had skin cancer so obviously I was stressed most of the time worrying because of the big knowing with her results and the operation she had to have so our relationship took strain.
Pleased to say daughter got the all clear and I couldn't be happier now my partner use to come round sit on his butt And watch me Run around doing washing, yes his even though he didn't live here he was here over Xmas no thanks no nothing so we argued he walked out and he finished it so I agreed yep let's finish it a day later he text all nice as he had done a previous time finished it and then text as if nothing had happened and I said were not doing this again you can't keep finishing with me and then start texting like nothing has happened it's not fair and that's how it stayed for a few days ..we was texting each other but it was just civil . Ok so I calmed down did some thinking and yes I missed him and as we were being civil I told him I missed him.. Well now his turned round saying I want to be single I don't want to be with you when a few days before he was acting like we hadn't split up ! And now a complete turn around I'm not sure if this is some cruel ego game his playing like he wants to be in control and wants me to chase him (not happening) but the complete change its like a different person and giving Me lectures about why we shouldn't be together but he also says I don't want to leave this on bad terms.
a few days have past and he had some parcels delivered here so i texted saying you have some parcels here which should have been here over xmas he replied saying he would pick them up if i leave them outside. as he didnt want to see me ???. we was amicable and civil and we chatted and i said i was seeing a clairvoyant on the 21st and he said on maybe your find out about your new boyfriend which i ignored and told him that i was looking forward to seeing what she said and again he bought up yeah she might tell you your going to meet a lovely new fella and get married now, when before we was together he use to say he couldn't handle thinking if me with anyone else as it use to make him feel physical sick inside, so why does he keep saying this and trying to push me further away, he admitted he missed, but couldn't go back to how it was before.. so why keep going on about me meeting someone else he keeps doing it !! what do i do now ....
If the "strain" started when your daughter got sick, then he might have thought YOU pushed him away - Like a child whose parent is distracted by another issue, the child thinks it's his fault.
I don't know if you have the energy to try to fix this, or want a man who does not seem to be very mature.
There's lots to be untangled here. It seems you both miss each other but the words get in the way for getting back together.
Perhaps going to counseling would help - both of you together.
he did think i pushed him away and he said that during her illness, but i made sure i made him part of everything that was going on but obviously i was stressed and trying to hold things together.
yes very immature in my eyes because everything seemed to be turned around to be about him and his needs, and yes i do understand people have needs, but he could see i was very stressed out and worried i wasnt sleeping... it made things worse between us..
I feel his playing a game with me which i refuse to play trying to punish me for the way i made him feel, yeah i miss him and his told me he misses me maybe some space between us will give us both time to think about what we both want and anger and hurt can then subside.
But it doesnt help when he keeps saying oh well maybe when you go out your meet a new fella that just made me angry he doesn't know it has because i don't want to argue with him i have no energy for that..