Should i remain patient?
So I'm dating this guy for 4 months now. And i havent been introduced to hes 7 yr old son or family members. Jeez not even a friend for that matter. But with me he has met some of my family members and two sons. He's a great guy. He's kind and very nice. But we seem only to hang out at night. He keeps me a mystery but on the other hand he treats me and my two kids with he's kindness. Very difficult. Should i remain patient or should i end it so i can actually be with someone else.
Hi Bradley. Sorry your'e feeling so confused and unsure about what to do here! You've been dating for 4 months, and it seems like being introduced to people in his life, and spending daytime time together are your biggest struggles right now. Unless there are other things?
I'm going to say an obvious thing - People move in and progress through relationships (establish trust, bond, etc) at different paces. I'm sure you're aware of that and that's why you know this is a question of patience.
Now I'm going to say something much less obvious - People express and feel love (establish trust, bond, etc) through different means. Love languages, as it were. So to *you* maybe being introduced to people in his life is a way *you* feel loved and that's why you have introduced him, etc. It's possible that's not his own Love language and although I'm sure he's interested in engaging (in some form or another) because he's been kind, and nice, etc. Consider that *his* way of establishing bonds is time spent alone with you. Maybe he's been trying to express his interest in bonding with you by wanting to spend time with you at night? And you're seeing that as a negative because of what it means to you, but maybe put on another set of eyes (and ears) and try to understand what these actions mean to *him.*
It's quite possible that you're both trying to bond, but don't understand each other's languages yet. It's also possible that he's just not as into it as you. Keep us updated!
Four months is not a long time, but you should be seeing him and his friends during all times for sure now. What's going on during the weekends that he can't spend a Sat. or Sun. afternoon with you in his world?
Does he have custody of his child? How long has he been divorced? Perhaps he does not want his child involved in his "adult" relationships just yet.
It seems you are more open and casual with your friends than he is. You are just going to have to watch this and honor his pace. First you, then his friends, then family, then kids.
Well guys. He broke up with me in a text. I said okay can u come by and he didnt even let me finish that flippn sentence b4 saying u i told u i dont wanna be with you. I said i have your jacket shirt and blanket sooo do u want it or not. He told me he met someone else why he said this i could care less. Its like okay u could have just left it at I'm breaking up with u. Oh well another one bites the dust.
He broke up with you in a TEXT? How old is that guy? how immature!!
Sorry for your disappointment.
Wow. That's an all-around bummer! Bradley, to echo Susie, I'm SO sorry for your disappointment. What a jerk. Guess you got your answer, and kudos for staying strong and true long enough to see the truth about him. Well, I guess the silver lining is that it's a lot less painful and a lot more difficult to struggle with the loss when it's such a gross one. I hope you've already washed your hands of this guy, at least he finally made it easy for you to! Sheesh.