hello, I am from the other country and I am in the USA now. I have lived in here past 5years. I graduated from university on Dec.2008 and I started as part time worker at the mall. in 2009 February, I met this American guy and we have been in a good relationship since then. we have been together for a year and a month. I had another job and we were happy and enjoying time together. We even started living together.
Then we started worry about visa, that if I do not get visa, I have to go back to my country.I have been trying to get VISA in order to stay in the USA, so that I could keep working here, live here, and keep relationship with him.
He always kept talking about getting married so that we do not have to worry about visa. I thought about it too, because we love each other and we do not want to be apart. But still, I could not be ready in my mind.
He never have met my parents yet in my country, and we are both not stable in the economic part, I felt we were not ready....
Then my expiration on staying USA came on February and I could not get visa. I have to go home in few days....He and I were talking a lot about our relationship past 7 month that his mind is" get marry and stay, be with me! Or if you go back to your country we cannot keep our relationship we will be over" and my mind is" I love you so much that I never want to be apart, but I am not ready, I want to keep relationship and I will be back, I feel like we are not ready" We have been talking like this past months and now I have no choice to stay USA.
I was not ready for marriage, I felt we had some things that we need to concern: I did not show him to my parents, and also I could not afford to get married either, because to apply for visa, I need to prepare money for the lawyer and application fees. I was more realistic than romantic....I mean I love him so much, but we cannot just get married with no responsibility on money part....I was still getting help from my parents on apt rent and some other things.
It is not so easy for me to get married in this situation, but I DO NOT want to lose him. Now I feel like I cannot do anything, since I am leaving in 3days, it kills me putting all the things in our apartment and get ready to go home. I am glad to see my family and friends in back home my country, but at the same time I am so sad and that if it would be the last time to see my boyfriend?
I mean, it is hard even if he says we will keep this relationship.
But at this point, He is saying that we will not be able to keep relationship, I feel like there is no hope for us.
My problem here is, I do not want to go back to my country, I do not want to lose my boyfriend...I even feel like I could not be happy in my country if I lose him....