I'm having a problem with this girls iv known for 2 years now.We started talking about a year ago.. Getting close and hanging out. We both really like each other but everytime she leaves my house she always say "I just wanna let you know if I don't see you for awhile, Its not because I don't want to." Currently she's the youngest in here Family. I'm 22 years old and shes about to turn 22.She's always so busy with work, taking care of her grandpop that is dieing of Chemo and I tottally understand where shes is coming from. I tell her all the time i understand and im here for her.Iv never had feelings for such a girl in my life. ( not my friends gf/friend whatever you wanna call it. ) She came over for the 3rd time and this time I had her met my mother. Now I only bring girls around that I really like and let them meet my Mother. We had a great time we ate dinner had a few beverages and then Mom went to Bed. ME and her were cuddling on the couch and talking and she understands everything I romantically tell her. But lately since everything going on in her at Home life. she's telling me It's not fair for me to not have someone meaning (her) to be around as much as I can be around, Then she says she doesn't wanna be selfish about it which doesn't make sense to me. We get along great we talk act and hold each other as if we were dating. I literally do everything for this girl. I cook for her I completely step out of my comfort zones too prove to this girl how much I truly love her. Without saying I LOVE YOU. So Today the conversation of me not understanding why she can't be here for me like she knows I want her to be. I don;t know if this is really confusing you guys and I'm sorry. Iv been reading stuff all night about relationship and when A girl doesn't wanna be apart of your life anymore. So I came here. Me being dumb and saying Listen I want whats best for you and if that means you don't wanna be apart of what we could possibly have then we should stop talking and go on with ourselves. Trying to get a reaction out of her. Then she hits me with this. I was thinking more like damage control. I googled and just about tried to find every aspect of what that means when A girl says that to someone. Can someone please Help me figure this out. Im literally letting it get the best of me and Doing thing I shouldn't be doing Because of the heartache This beautiful loving girl is putting me through. Someone please help.
Your post is somewhat confusing so I am trying to understand here. I take it that she is extremely busy in life with everything going on, which limits the two of you from seeing each other very much. How often do you see her? Do you talk often when you are apart? Does she call you or initiate your visits?
Damage control means 'trying to control the situation before too much damage arises' so to speak....so maybe she thinks she is already harming you by not being able to give herself to you the way she knows you deserve. That is why she said it's not fair for you to not have her around as much as she can. She said she doesn't want to be selfish because she is trying to do the right thing.
Tell her what she means to you and be completely honest. She may not be so inclined to move on if she knows you love her. If she is still resistant, talk to her about it and explain how you would like to be there for her during this trying time in her life. And if all else fails, give her some time to sort through these issues she has right now, and maybe when she isn't so stressed out from everything, she can make herself more available to you.
It's very confusing.. To the point where i can't even type it correctly. Does this mean she wants me to leave her alone?
We talk all the time.. Goodmorning, goodnight, miss you. And due to everything going on we don't get to see each other very often maybe once a month. But we communicate all the time. She was at my house the other night and we had a great time together. Then she leaves and send me a text saying. " I just want to say if I'm not over for awhile it is not because I don't want to. My Schedule is crazy and I don't have alot of free time you know that. I'm just saying if I could be back over tonight i would be. But that's not a possibility."
anyone else have any idea? Am I gonna hurt myself for pursuing this girl of my dreams?