i'm 20 years old now.i'm in love with my bf since 5 years.last year i was diagnosed with malignant tumour in my right ovary.Doctor told me that my case was normal and its completely curable.. so they removed my right ovary and I undergone chemotherapy immediately.as of now i've no problem. But i'm having fear whether cancer will come back again.My bf is huge supportive for me all the time.But i'm having guilty for loving him beacause of my health.i'm thinking about his future and how will he bear the pain if i gets cancer again. i'm cured now but still i have the fear..i've only one ovary so i'm concerned about my pregnancy and also about sex life.
"But i'm having fear whether cancer will come back again."
Well, of course you are; that's natural (you're programmed to).
Switch your thinking. You've been to hell and back, meaning you're now a savvy veteran. You *didn't* die, you survived - to the max. If it happened again (big IF, given that lightning doesn't tend to strike twice in the same place), this time you'd handle it like a pro. That gives you an advantage over someone who hasn't ever been there, doesn't it. It gives you less to fear.
But what's happening now, in your relationship, is this: BECAUSE you assume wrongly that you're not in control of things you feel you should be, you're redirecting your urge to control onto things that aren't yours to control. Specifically, they're *his*. It's *his* freewill choice. And he's clearly made it.
Why guilty? Sounds to me, going by his decision, that he's a rescuer type, meaning, being his woman's rock is an *attractive* thing to him that makes him feel *good and proud* of himself. Why would you want to take that away from him when he so obviously wishes to keep it?
As for the sex life: hasn't your doctor provided you with all the reassurances on this score? If not, I suggest you book an appointment so that she can put you straight. Assuming the fallopian tube that leads from it is still working, you only *need* one ovary, in fact. Re intercourse itself: what specifically is your worry here?
Your boyfriend must make this decision. You had a bad case of feeling out of control but now it is over and you have not recovered. You know that you can have children and the return of cancer is not under your control It will take time. You have a good boyfriend. You love each other.