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Feeling betrayed

Posted by
JKHC
on Mar 23 2015 at 06:34
Member since: 23 March 2015
Relationship advice I am 7 months pregnant with my husbands only child. since becoming pregnant I have become depressed. my dr prescribed my anti depressants which my husband wont allow me to take. two nights ago he took a female friend out to dinner they were gone 5 hours! when they got back I was sitting outside she couldn't even come say good bye to me. (she is a single woman.) of course the entire situation ticked me off and hurt me. I think it was very disrespectful on both of there ends. my husband told me im nuts and need help. when he got home I asked why I wasn't invited? he simply stated because neither one of us wanted you there. do I have a right to be mad? or am I over reacting? any advice would be appreciated.

Feeling betrayed

Reply from
SDR91M
on Mar 23 2015 at 07:29
Member since: 19 March 2015
Hi

First of all, I would like to state that whatever I advice, is up to you to follow or not. I take no responsibility for any consequences if any.

Saying that, I would like to state what I would have done had I been in your situation:

Pregnancy is a period where every woman has mood swings. They may be forced to sit back at home, take an off from work, and may be asked to stay at home and not go out, so as to save you and your new born from any dangers/injuries. But, that has it's own limits.

I understand that your husband has asked you not to take anti depression pills, but that may be because he thinks that they are not healthy for you and your baby (which is actually true as they do have adverse side-effects at times).

I may suspect an odd behavior or ill intentions behind your not being invited to the dinner and especially when your husband clearly states that WE BOTH DID NOT WANT YOU THERE. In such cases, I would suggest that you ignore such stressful thoughts FOR THE SAKE OF THE UNBORN BABY as such stressful thoughts and actions may cause trouble.

I suggest you keep ignoring these issues till the time of delivery of the baby. Once the child is/are born, you may call both (female colleague and your husband) for a small chit chat and sort this issue out. You must take wise decisions as it is not just you who is involved in this mess but your baby as well. So whatever decision you may take, think about the child's future before taking any step as any action positive or negative, will impact the child.

as an alternative, you can talk to a trustworthy mutual friend who knows that female and your husband (maybe school time or college time or office colleague) so as to be sure of any suspicious behaviors on the part of your husband.

Feeling betrayed

Reply from
BLUES7
on Mar 23 2015 at 15:59
Member since: 23 March 2015
Get rid of him. He is a disrespectful loser who doesn't deserve you. Sounds shallow, I know but, if he truly loved you, he would be taking you out to dinner and not some single woman. The fact that they both didn't want you to be there is a slap in the face from both of them. I would not stand for that type of ignorance for one second. Move on, sweetheart. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

Feeling betrayed

Reply from
SDR91M
on Mar 24 2015 at 02:36
Member since: 19 March 2015
i would slightly disagree here. A disrespectful lover may not necessarily mean that he does not deserve you or anything. You should wait till your delivery so as to avoid any unnecessary trouble. Then make a decision based on your observations then.

Feeling betrayed

Reply from
RLNAY355
on Mar 24 2015 at 04:13
Member since: 24 March 2015
That's such a crappy feeling. I'm sure that he knows that what he did was hurtful. I feel like men call you crazy to make you feel insecure, in hopes that you'll back off. You know it was wrong. I'm sure he'd throw a fit if you were to go out with another man for 5 hours (or dinner at all for that matter). You have every right to be upset and I'm sure that you wouldn't even have been near this upset if he had apologized. It's not fair to feel this stressed why you're pregnant. So sorry <3

Feeling betrayed

Reply from
RAINBOWS&MAGIC
on Mar 24 2015 at 05:06
Member since: 24 March 2015
This sounds a bit weird, but sometimes pregnancy does funny thing to our thinking too.

either ways, its your time to be taken care of, and be pampered, even if ou are being a bit unreasonable. Sit down with your man and tell him how you feel. and do whatever you need to do to stop being depressed- its very very important for the baby.

If the situation seems bad and too confusion right now, maybe you can go over to your parents house or your best friends place or something, and stay there till you feel better. It may not be that your situation is genuinely bad, maybe its just the pregnancy hormones, but you do not need to deal with it right now. and you cannot let yourself be anxious or depressed. shut it all away for the time being, you only need to feel special and happy right now - and its okay to be selfish!

god bless you and your baby!

Feeling betrayed

Reply from
SUSIEDQQ
on Mar 25 2015 at 13:42
Member since: 27 December 2013
Your husband owes you an explanation, but it seems you two don't talk much or the words get in the way.

How is it that your husband is taking single women out for dinner without you? Is she a co-worker? family friend?

Could there be the possibility that they were planning a party for you? Or do you suspect something sinister? Do you know her?

Would he go to counseling with you? You can get more explanation where you can let your feelings out in a safe place.

Why aren't you taking the medication that will make you feel better?

Feeling betrayed

Reply from
!!!
on Mar 27 2015 at 03:05
Member since: 07 February 2014
Maybe he is unhappy. On the face of it he seems to have given a really unpleasant answer. Is this usual? Do you suspect something? I agree you have to talk to him.

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