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Should I leave or not? I love him.....

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I am at my wits end. I am with a man who I love very much. We've even talked of marriage and I can honestly see spending the rest of my life with him. My problem is porn. Usually, I don't really have any problem with someone looking at porn. But this has turned into a serious problem. It's got to the point that I resent it very much. I have seen messages from date sights, he's trolled on craigslist etc...I tried being very open and honest with him to no avail. Tonight was my last straw. It's his birthday and we are in a motel room. Almost immediately he went into his own world with the iPad. Sure enough, with me right next to him, he was watching porn. I was moderately upset and he responded with the excuse he was trying to find one for the both of us. I've even offered to make one with him... Feeling helpless and hopeless I asked him if he really realized what his obsession with porn makes me feel, or if he knew what it is and has done and what it could do to our relationship on the future. He didn't even hear the entire statement before going back to the screen. I feel foolish for even being here still...what should I do? My head says put on my walking shoes but my heart won't let me. I am do confused. I don't think he cares how I feel.

Should I leave or not? I love him.....

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"My head says put on my walking shoes but my heart won't let me."

Why not? (These boots are made for walking . . .remember that song? - probably not) What holds you to him?

"I can honestly see spending the rest of my life with him."

Really? Oh dear, think more about this. His addiction will NOT get better (or acceptable)

"He didn't even hear the entire statement before going back to the screen."

Yup - that's where you are in his life. That's how important his porn is.


Should I leave or not? I love him.....

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I have had this addiction and I am 75, in a different way but definitely internet and managed to conquer it. Pure self belief, a mega shock to my system and changing my ways. Good luck.

Should I leave or not? I love him.....

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"I don't think he cares how I feel."

That's your answer. You should not consider marrying someone who doesn't care how you feel.

This thread has expired - why not start your own?

B-3