For a long time i thought i was gay, im an 18 year old guy, when i was hiding the gay side of me i had a girlfriend like most people do, and i eventually came out. ive had relationships with guys ever since because thats who i thought i was, but now ive fallen completely in love with a guy who is perfect, nothings ever gonna happen and ive kind of accepted that becaus ive had to, but ive done nothing but think about him for a long time, but over the last few months its been different, because im not thinking about him, im thinking about what i liked about him, and i dont see me settling down with a guy, i dont want to, i feel like i should be falling in love with a girl, i think its more normal, its more natural and ive started picturing myself with people from my college, and it looks nice, theyre all girls and i just think that the more i thik about it... i never fell in love with the guy, it was the way he was and it has completely messed with my head.
i know i want kids, i kow i want a family. but i just dont know who i am anymore, i dont know if i am gay or straight or bi or what, i want to be with a girl, but ive only ever fell in love with this guy, and i cant have him, so i dont know what it is that i want if you follow this you deserve a medal D:
You are 18, hang out with both guys and girls if thats possible and meanwhile try not stress about it, but try and enjoy yourself, perhaps you go out with your friends in a group? or maybe 1 or 2 close friends, but you will 'find' yourself at some point but meanwhile focus on other parts of your life, what do you want to be or do when you leave college? are there other courses or hobbies you would like to do. Not dwelling on it so much will wreck your head less.
hope you can follow that and is my medal in the post .....best of luck
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