I am a 25 year old independent woman. I love my parents and they absolutely love me more than I love them. I have no doubt about that.
But my only concern is they do not understand me! They never try and understand what I am going through, they think very differently and they always push their decisions over me.
Whether it is my career or my marriage, they want me to listen to them. They do not understand my career aspirations and goals in life.
They do not want me to work hard.
When I have a bad day at office, I cannot discuss it with my parents. They do not get it. My mother simply says quit the job. Why are you even working? Once you get married, you can rely on your husband. I do not want to quit my job. All I want is my parents to understand my issues and support me.
They just want me to have a good life and comfortable life. I am a very hard-working, independent, self-reflective woman with high aspirations and dreams in life.
I want to help people. I believe that Life has a purpose and I need to do my best to make a difference in the world. I believe in being happy, having faith, helping people, finding meaning in small things in life, enjoying every moment and all that. They do not know all this about me and neither are they interested to know. They do not know what kind of person I am.
Whether it is a small decision or a big one, They are always against me. They do not even understand why I do what I do.
I am from a country where arranged marriages are prominent. They chose a guy for me year and half ago. The marriage was decided. The guy and me - We completely understood each other and I was really happy to get a life partner like that. Because of a small issue with his leg, my parents cancelled the marriage. From over an year I have been trying to convince them to just talk to the guy once.
I even questioned them that as this marriage was decided by them and the guy was chosen by them, at least they owe me that much. They should at least try talking to his parents once and listen to their side of the story.
They pushed me so much for this marriage and now that they do not want me to get married to him they are asking me to forget him. I am tired of expecting them to understand my perspective.
Please help me with any advice
It seems you have a real generational/cultural/familial gap between you and your parents that threatens your future - in love, career, marriage, and your self esteem.
At 25, you are well enough to know your own desires. So the question is: can you be your own person?
Did (do) you love this man? What kind of "small issue with his leg" could possible make him an unworthy candidate for a husband? Are you two still talking?
It seems your parents have an exaggerated need for perfection and status. You don't seem to share their value system. I hope you will be strong enough to put limits on how much control they have over your life. It is YOUR life, after all, huh?