I need to prove to myself I'm better than they think
I'm a track and field sprinter..I mainly focus at 100m and 200m respectively..I made a promise to myself and my parents that i would break the team record and curve my name on the wall..It means as lot to me i know that someday someone else will break it again but until then i want that form of satisfaction and fulfillment that comes along with the personal record cause you know you've worked very hard for it..Truth is was so focused on that goal to the point that i was training until i threw up or collapsed..I truly truly madly deeply want this..Anyhow to the point..My performance has been amazing during the training sessions my times in training show that im in excellent shape and i can break the record but here comes the actual problem..There people there that they pick on me every day they make fun of my efforts i can see them laughing and joking about my efforts and whenever we talk they make fun and mock me about my race results..I've had a race a few weeks back and it was the first race of the year and honestly i didn't go that well i didn't feel ready both physically and mentally and the weather didn't help either we had - wind which affects times...Since then i've worked ever harder cause i got really frustrated and dissapointed with myself and i had those people mocking me constantly and i just cant stand people calling me a loser and mock me constantly my mentality is wrong whenever i race i think of them and i never give my 100% and my mentality is so wrong whenever it's race time...Then i fail they call me a loser and eventually i feel like one..I've have been working day and night so hard to break that record and i won't feel satisfied until i do...I cant be and i dont want to be a loser anymore..
Loser?..you're no loser. The people who mock you are the losers. Don't let them drag you down to their level. You need to focus on your goal totally and surround yourself with people who support you totally.
To waste the person you really are is the biggest loss you can inflict on yourself..never mind the team track record. The people who trash you are doing this to themselves but you don't have dance to their tune. If you really want it and need it, and your ability and mentality is right, then you will achieve your goal..no two ways about it.
In the meantime, focus on your weaknesses and turn them into strengths without over exerting yourself and listen to those who are genuine and respect you for your efforts and determination.
I'm concerned that your intense need to break a record has to do with what others think about you. Say you do break that record and their behavior doesn't change, will you feel let down anyway? There are always people who try to tear others down no matter who you are, how far you go or what you accomplish. In fact, from what I've observed, the more someone accomplishes in life the more hecklers he/she attracts. But these people will eventually disappear from your life and as long as you don't let your running (or anything else you do) be about them, you can keep them from remaining strong in your memories once they're gone. When you run, do so for yourself. Make it about your goals, what you envision and how you will feel when you succeed regardless of anyone else. Hecklers can spout off and embarass themselves with their own bad behavior, what they do is not really about you. You and all their other targets are just opportunities to take out their own unhappiness. Don't let them influence you to start tearing yourself down. Any time you find yourself doing that, change the things you're telling yourself to something you've done well or intend to do or were happy about no matter how big or small. Find the goals you want for yourself. As long as you keep moving towards those, you'll be doing great. If that goal is breaking a record, then when you're at that starting block it's about what you're telling yourself because no one else matters.