Not sure if I should get out of this marriage
I was adopted as a child. When my parent divorce my adopted mum went sour and resentful over me. She never communicated to me what was happenning. However , because I had a close relationship with adopted father. I did chose his side. So from the age of 15, she started setting me up with people through people I new . Making me think I met them by myself, she continue to ruin my life with no guidance or communication but kept me under her house. Her family continue to be rude and abusive with words. Made the men in her family abuse me,because I was so quiet at the time. Even set me up my husband. I thought it was love at the time. She was not help when I got married emotionally. Me husband has been married for 10 years have 2 children. My motherilaw is a bully, because she knows I have no supportive relative. Is really manipulative and knows how to play her , so there's no competition. She plays nice when she's around me. She's spread so much lies to family and friend about me. I don't think my husband love me anymore. He want to be there for his child and that's what keeping him here. His a devoted dad. My own mother is so dishonest to me. I know I have no one to fall back, so I'm on speaking term with her. But it not great. I know her family will never accepted nor does my adopted family. When I was young from the age of 15, because of so much jealousy and hated , I use to gossip so much about how my adopted mother was treating me to relative .Im not saying I'm perfect , I've made lots mistake, because I never had someone to give me good advice. What they would do instead of saying you should discuss with your mum.They would go behind my back and tell and she would continue to be rude to me with her action. Sometime I wish I wasn't adopted. I do wonder if life would get better. It hard to see it. Mother-in-law has spread so many rumours to husband friend about. That their disrespectful to me. I tell my husband but he doesn't see it. It's so frustrating. So I try not to attend his friends event now. However, they do take him out a lot, which they know I hate. Adopted mother has made so many people turn against. Now I have no friends, husband friends hate me and in law hate. And also mother always deny things, if I say something am imagining things. So that alone is frustrating. So I find it pointless to communicate with her about my feeling. Sorry for writting so much. Hope I get good advice
God loves forgiveness, patience, love, compassion, charity and virtue in general.