Breaking up with siblings
First of all, I am 25 haven't finished school and am currently sitting on EI for the moment.
I have spent my life since 16, working for my household. My mother left at that time, she took off and took everything in our pockets with her. My father was laid off and so emotionally low that he couldn't give my younger brother and siser the proper upbringing they should have received. I did my best. I kept them in school, I kept them in competitive soccer, I fed them, I worked 3 jobs and tried for every promotion I could get my hands on to make sure they didn't lack.
My regret is that by not teaching them to be adults, I left them unable to take care of themselves.
My sister is 21, works at a bar and has a drinking problem that leaves her with a dirty apartment and low self-esteem and zero respect for herself. My brother is 20, hasn't graduated from highschool, has issues with laziness and doesn't seem to want to take any responsibility for his life.
I still pay for him to live and I am sick of it.
I have had plenty of opportunities and haven't gone off on my own to figure them out, due to guilt that they might not make it without me. I may be on EI presently, however I spend my time not partying, or getting into trouble, but trying to learn java on my own and want to further myself. I feel like my only solution is to leave the city I am in and try somewhere else where I don't have the excuse of guilt for my siblings.
I don't want to ditch them or leave them behind, however I cannot get ahead anymore with them tied to me. But, I feel guilt at the thought and it feels like giving up, but I don't feel like I have the choice anymore.
Any advice on what I should be doing, or what is right will be greatly appreciated.
You have done enough!! Time for YOU now. Don't feel guilty or give up.
Set a deadline for when you want to move. Simply tell them (with love) that it's time for you to move on and you will stay in touch. But be firm about the fact that you ARE moving on. THEN DO IT!!
You are not ditching them, you are letting them fly on their own. You have been a good model for them in how to take care of yourself and others. Now it is their turn to grow up. I have a feeling that they will muster up the courage and resourcefulness that will enable them to take care of themselves. You might be surprised.
Good luck and I hope you enjoy the freedom you deserve.