I have been married for 31 years. I have problems when my husband is not honest with me and then makes me out to be the problem. He lied to me several days ago and when I kindly faced him with it, (which goes against my personality to do this) he somehow made me out to be the bad person. I had told him that if he lied to me about transferring money into my account then what else is he lying about that I don't know. He has yet to apologize. I just checked his internet search history and he has been visiting porn sites and searching for nude photos of women that he knows and a recent client of his.
I just want him to move out. I don't know how to feel. I don't know how to talk to him because he either sulls up, walks out of the room or somehow blames me.
We don't fuss, we don't fight, we never yell at each other. To the outside world and our friends, they think we are the epidemy of a perfect marriage.
When I think of telling him that I feel betrayed and fear that he is going to blame me and I don't know how to handle it.
Leave a note by the computer.
A note telling him you've seen what he's searched and you're disgusted and sick of it.
This way he knows how you feel but he can't blame you.
Keep calm, tell him you're not living with a man that can do that to his wife.
Hopefully he'll understand and change.
If not, pack his stuff an get him out.