I have been with my current partner for two years, and I've known him since we were kids. He is a recovering addict and attends meetings regularly, he's been clean for three years. Three weeks ago he started working for a woman, (construction) that he found out is also in the program which is great but, the day he got the job he said he was meeting her at a store that was already closed to pick up payment, and wound up staying there taking to this woman for over an hr at 11:30 pm, and has been bringing up this woman a lot on a daily basis, how funny she is, and they have certain things in common, I didn't think much of it. Three days ago he brought up a conversation they had about her not being able to have children and that she froze her eggs and wants to have kids, that she may use a surrogate etc.
As a woman I find this topic really intimate and personal so I feel their is some sort of heart to heart they are having.
While working there he has stopped calling me like he used to, he spends his time texting her or taking to her about her job. I stay at his home a few days a week and normally after not seeing each other for 4-5 days he would be excited about being intimate with me, last night he said he didn't feel like it and wante to know if we could just do tomorrow, I acted taken back so we became intimate, except he decided to use protection, which is something we haven't done in a year, since we are engaged and just with each other. I totally confused as to what is going on. I told him the conversation he had with this woman made me uncomfortable, he said it was just what addicts do, they speak their mind sometimes inappropriately, he keeps making excuses for her.
Ask to meet her, see what is reaction is. Ask him why is a condom now necessary? You have reason to be concern, this women may be going after your man and using the old ADdicts/AA/Buddy- to spend time with him.