Can you trust someone who has stolen from you.. twice
I stopped talking to this girl for two months. Prior to that we had broken off our friendship due to me having feelings for her I couldn't put aside. That was in March, we started talking again in May. She came to visit me after work and started crying because she said she had missed me a lot. She told me she thought she made a mistake in letting me go. I went to her house and stayed over and we kissed and that was it. I loss my debit card within a day or two of that happening and my money was withdrawn. I didn't think it was her because even though we had not been talking I trusted her then and I trusted her up to that point. For the time that I have known her, I can read her like a book. I can read her facial expressions and always know how she feels about something. It doesn't fit her character to do something like that. It happened again recently I 'lost' my debit card and the money was taken again. This was on 7/11, 3 days ago. My suspicions arose because of the way I lost it. This time I called the bank again and canceled the card once again. I proceeded to ask where the money was withdrawn and they told me the same location as the first time. Without a doubt in my mind I knew it was her. I asked them if I could get a picture to try and identify the person. They said it was possible and it could take up to a week. I finally sent her the text yesterday telling her I lost my card again and that the person withdrew the money from the same location. I also said that I would get a picture within 2-3 days. She called me and asked what happen. I told her exactly what I said through the text and she said "I have to tell you something but idk how you're gonna take it" and I said "I already know what you're gonna say" and she said "what is it". I told her she stole my money and she said yeah but she didn't do it the first time and I said I already know you did. She then admitted it and expressed how sorry she was. I can't believe that she took the debit card out of my wallet twice. She knows I don't make a lot of money and she probably has more than me. Now that I'm looking back at everything.. I know she plotted this. It was premeditated. She told me that everything with me was real, meaning her feelings towards me. But I just don't know anymore. This was someone I would have easily gave my pin number to and she looked over my shoulder to get it. The first time she did this to me I didn't even suspect her. I figured I loss it and someone had just found a way to get passed the pin. The second time she did this to me I had just gotten my first paycheck from a new job and paid her nails and meal to just be robbed the next morning.. She's said she feels bad about what she's done and that she never wanted to lose me for something like this. I told her you didn't feel bad enough the first time that you went and did it again? She told me had I not found out on my own I would have never known she did it because she wouldn't have told me. We were close before this and it hurts me that she did this to me. It's not about the money but how she just went against my trust like that. She said she's willing to do anything to not lose me in her life and to prove she wants to rectify this. But I just can't help but think.. she did it twice. I asked her what she spent the money on and she said she owed money for student loans but I don't believe that. I feel as if she spent the money on clothes or something,but she's sticking to her story. She also said she didn't think it would hurt me because I would get the money back from the bank. To top it all off she took the debit card while I was making breakfast for her. I want to forgive her but I don't think she should be a part of my life anymore. It just makes me think about what else has she ever lied to me about. This hurt me on a new level. She was willing to risk everything for a couple of dollars. Can you trust someone who's done this to you? Should I give her a second chance?
Well this would be a 3rd chance, if she had any remorse or felt as bad she wouldn't have done it a 2nd time. She even admits had you not found out she would never have told you. She seems to think just because the bank may reimburse you, that nobody got hurt. She fails to see that she broke her trust with you and she thinks its ok to do that. I know everyone deserves chances and perhaps this may wake her up and change, it's hard to know for sure cos she was even trying to tell you that she did it the 2nd but not the first! |
If you love this girl and can't bring yourself to live without her, then maybe a 3rd chance...but I think you will always be looking over your shoulder, and if anything goes missing or you genuinely lose your wallet, who is the first person you will blame.