Sugar daddy relationship
First of all I don't need to be judged. A couple of years ago my wife and I were having problems and I met and entered into a relationship with a young college student. She has never wanted to talk on the phone and insist that we communicate by text. At first she would agree to times to meet and agree to go with me to places but would not show at the last minute and not respond to my text. Usually a few days later she would text me with an excuse of left her phone, family emergency came up, etc. I let her know that she has to respect me and let me know beforehand if she had to cancel or it was over. After about a year we broke it off for about a year. Last October I happened across her phone number and texted her. Bottom line we started seeing each other again. In May she asked for money to pay her aunt back for a car she bought. I told her that I couldn't get all at one time but would give her half then and the other half in June. Things were really great; we were texting daily and we're seeing each other at least weekly, then after I gave her the second half of the money, she started being slow responding to text messages. The Friday morning a week after I gave her the money, I texted her if she wanted to meet me that afternoon. She didn't respond until about 3 asking when. I asked how about 4. After about 10 minutes I I said never mind and she replys immediately asking why never mind she was in the shower and ends with a frowning face. I then reply that I said never mind because of the time but it she could meet at 5 I'd love to see her. I never got a response. I then text het almost daily for the next week without her responding...even threatening to come to her workplace to find out what was going on. Three days later I texted her from a number she did not recognize and she asked who it was about two hours later. I tell her and say that it's obvious that she didn't want to see me again hoped her the best. She immediately replays that she can explain! I the n face three days of nothing despite texting her twice asking when she planned to explain. I then drive to her house and arrive just as she is pulling into the driveway. I confront her about what is going on and she says she still wants to see me that she had a lot of things going on (a sick brother, extra hours at work, father getting married etc) I tell her ok to text me when she is ready. 4 or 5 days later I texted her to see how she was doing and she replied. I asked her if she would have time the following week to see me or if she needed more time. She replied back that she wanted to see me in two days. We meet and as we start to leave she says she doesn't want to talk right now because she would get upset but would wanted to talk later. Two hours later she text me upset that I had crossed major boundaries by threatening her and coming to her house. We text back and forth and I apologize and ask if she can forgive me. No answer. Three days later I text her telling her goodby and she relays that she could forgive me. I send her a couple of text over the last few days one of them asking if she would have time for me next week. No answer, on Monday I text her on my other phone saying I need to talk to her and she replays ok. I ask if she was ignoring me in hopes that I would just go away or if she just needed time and space. She text me on my other phone that she has time this week. I let her know that Thursday or Friday afternoon would work best for me and to let me know. Yesterday (Tuesday) morning I had appoinments cancel so I text her and tell her that that afternoon would be good for me. She replies Bach that she had to work all afternoon. I tell he ok and let me know what works for her. No reply. Today at lunch I text her asking if she had a day/time that would work for her so that I could make plans and now 6 hours later still no response...I need advice. I know I should drop this and put her behind me but I'm not sure I can let her go! Thoughts?
As you well know, this young woman is a user and has been playing you for a long time. She dictates the relationship and it's plainly obvious that she's enthusiastic only when she wants or needs something from you. Her continued excuses for not seeing you are a classic example of someone who uses control to manipulate for personal gain. Actions speak and her actions are screaming at you.
You have answered your own post by stating that you know to drop it. Take your thoughts further and step away from it all and realize that if your relationship was going anywhere, she would be with you completely...regardless of age and circumstances. As for letting her go, it should be a given, because the sooner you do it, the sooner you will be out from under her control.
Be true to yourself, delete her and her phone number and get on with your life.
thanks Manalone that is as I suspected. I had hoped that there would be a way i could get her to respond. I may be fooling myself but I did not expect nor want the relationship to go beyond what we had. I just wish she would have continued being enthusiastic and we could have kept the mutually beneficial relationship going.
One word: WIFE.
But, oh, I don't need any judgement for typing that.
I have to agree.. with SOULMATE. No judgement here. But hey, wtf? :/ college student. Younger I am assuming. You got it right in your title. And in your post. Although you seem confused and possibly afraid. She may be using you. But aren't you also using her? Or trying to? Anyways.
Not judging. But maybe just stick to the porn.. it's just a fantasy anyways. Maybe invite your WIFE along with you.. on your fantasy. That is. Best of luck.
A set up like that will only ever spell disaster
It's not fair on anyone involved and seems fraught with anxiety and stress.
Is this girl really worth all the heartache?
There's an old saying: "There's no fool like an old fool."
Your warning should have been her asking for money, then ignoring you after she got what she wanted.
Please turn around and deal with your wife. What were the problems that you had that made you seek the excitement of a much younger girl?
When is the last time you had a physical? You also may be depressed. May I ask your age?
STOP! you need to stop falling into this... you are being used..
she doesn't want nor need you and you are getting emotional for a sugar daddy. let her go. i am not supporting your being a sugar daddy but you need to really think long and hard about what you are doing, if you still want to remain a sugar daddy remember you are hurting your wife and its not fair..
however if you are hellbent on being a sugar daddy, you need to not involve yourself in emotions with sugar babies .. they only want the money and not have to answer to you in any capacity.
STOP and read everyones advice and drop her...
I'm sure u already have gotten the point as I see the other responses. Please please take the advice of others. I've been that girl unfortunately and I can tell u right now this girl is using u and cares nothing about u. She tells u she cares bc she wants to string u along, keep u in her pocket in case she needs anything. She only wants u when SHE wants u, which is only when she NEEDS something. And u will NOT win, trust me when I say this, u will be on the loosing end with it all. U could loose ur wife, ur life as u know it and u won't have tht Lil college girl either. Besides she's probably talkin about u like ur some kinda chump. Do urself a favor and loose her number, just don't respond to her ever again. Focus that energy into your wife and u may be pleasantly surprised what u get in return