Should I trust my boyfriend?
I've been with my boyfriend for 9 months now and he means the world to me but I don't know if I can trust him.
He has a drug problem and has lied to me about using and spending money on drugs a fair few times. But he recently told me that a friend who he has on fb (a girl) who I wasn't fond of before because she messaged him a lot, he thought she was pretty but had told me a couple of weeks ago that he didn't think she was. He said he didn't want to hurt my feelings but is now just trying to be honest and it doesn't mean anything and she doesn't mean anything to him. He said it is just a natural thing. It's hard for me to believe that it's nothing when he has lied a lot in the past.
Yes, you need to get out now his drug problem is only going to get worse and it is a very long hard road if you stay. It's a night mare - In and out of jail, cant keep a job, steal from family and friends then blames everyone else for his problems. Not to mentions rehabs and es that is plural cause 30 days just doesn't cut it. If you can find at least a year long program for him thats best. In Santa Barbara they have a register to go over to Italy where they have a 75% rate you have t stay for 3 to 5 years but you learn so much plus a trade. Right now I agree he is trying to deflect with the girl...drug addicts are master munipulators and the only way he will get better she he decides enough is enough. Take care of yourself...remember you cant give all of you if you watch out and take care of yourself first,
Going through this myslef. Study up on drug abuse. The one he is on. I am older and have seen this befor. I am going throught it again and its drivung me crazy. Time to focus on ME. The people whi live you will help you. The ones like him will only hurt you sweet heart. GL
Can you trust his earlier statement was true or trust him on any level with anything? RSVP.
Agree with all of the above about how his volunteering of that information for the purposes of nothing more than 'just being honest' (how helpful of him :-p) sounds as if it contains a very subtle and tentative threat to lay off his addiction-based shennanigans or he might just decide to wander over to the arms of this girl whom he's now (how convenient :-p) claiming he DOES find pretty and whom, already being a 'fan', is more liable to accept him 'as is' (- if he's got a bona fide drugs habit - yeah, sure she would...for all of 5 minutes).
No, he won't (ugger off) and no he doesn't (find her pretty). His first statement was the truthful one. She might be into HIM but as far as he's concerned, she's just a 'fan' who right right now is a mightily useful tool to  (ref SARA454's take) deflect your attention from his faults and onto the idea of another woman seemingly encroaching onto your territory and posing a threat to your emotional welfare (I call it, pulling in the other woman) and  to 'get you back' for your having made him feel small over his habit.
Either that or what he finds pretty when high differs from his norm, as in 'beer goggles'? I wouldn't know unless you were to tell me whether you'd ever come across him snogging a lamppost? (joke)
But what are you calling a drug problem? And whose money did he lie about having spent - his own or yours or [scuse pun] joint funds?