I am told at work(in a popular fashion retail store) that without effort I am funny,cheerful,caring,nice,respectful,smart and that I have a unique and fun personality with a great since of style. I mostly get these comments at work from coworkers or customers but i hear them outside of work sometimes, but I never see myself as such a big deal. You would think that someone with these traits would have no problem finding a date but I do. When I was in high school hook ups weren't to hard for me to find, but since I graduated two years ago I have a problem getting women in my favor. I'm not a dog nor a whip but it's like I'm just not attracting anyone.
Girls say that I'm nice and funny and usually seems to be interested in knowing more about me, but when I suggest meeting up some where or an activity outside of work in a casual way they always keep their distance and a few times they have cancelled the afternoon I have planned as if they're afraid to go out with me. Then I see them talking to guys who look like they don't even try when they leave the house or act like they have no brain and I just wonder if it is me.
Like I said in school girls would voluntarily come up to me and spit game(i never been on a real date but meetings at my house or concert venues) but the only thing that changes since then was that I got rid of my teased colorful hair and have replaced that with a bit of facial hair. And I have been trying to appear more masculine and tried approaching women that I am attracted to out and about but even when i appear as my self they seem to be uninterested after I take the spot next to them and that can be embarrassing especially when she wants everyone around her to know that she just dissed someone. I even tried online dating but they always think im only interested in sex or they are very rude. I get made fun of because of my efforts and lack of sexual experience by my friends but that's not something im to worried about but, why can't I get a date if I always get complements about my appearance and personality and why are these not appealing to them, how can I get them to see me as attractive without playing dumb. I honestly been turned down so many times that I believe it's just not gonna work out for me even if I keep trying.
we live in a society where being "alpha" is the ongoing trend as well as image : it doesn't matter too much if you haven't got any brains as long as there are looks and the attitude to go with it - the play - even the words used today reflect that - it's all a game and it's about the one who gets away with it - our society seems to be nowadays very individualistic (some would say narcissistic) with a high emphasis on competition for immediate results/consumption - it all seems very superficial - so if you don't play the alpha one and get your 5 cents in there - there will be someone to outdo you - it looks as if society as a people is regressing - it's paradoxal : high instant technology to push but low basic instincts as a drive and sleeping brains/awareness - maybe you need to give yourself the means to go looking for people more on your wavelength - in real life as well as on forums on subjects that may interest you - goodluck