Do I have a controlling boyfriend?
I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 2 years we was friends before but always had a attraction towards eachother. Everything was okay until I realised my freedom has gone.. He is loving and caring but very overprotective and jealous, he says all his past girlfriends cheated on him so he's afraid to lose me. We live together and I have no other place to go so I feel abit trapped I'm 26 years old and still want to enjoy myself.. Help?
I can totally go both ways with this post .. Rather then my boyfriend being controlling it was I that was .. I would do vaguely what your boyfriend had/has bee doing .. But unfortunately yes .. That is a controlling relationship .. You should always stay true to your individuality and do what pleases you .. Try to convince your boyfriend that you love him and only him .. If you live with him .. Try leaving to little places first then go from there .. Remember you aren't his pet rather then his partner .. I'm always here if you need to talk .. I'm hope this helped some what .
I know how you feel have been in a relationship for 9 yrs (although we did split up 7yrs ago for about 12 months) we have had 3 kids together and are engaged and I have always had the same problem even now! He gets so cranky that he wants my undivided attention and it seems almost all the time... I feel i get not time to myself between him and the kids... We fight about it a fair bit I try to argue my point of view but its always turned back on me, and now that we have kids and are living together I feel trapped I keep trying to sort it out I still love him after all but some days I feel like I hate him too. Iv tried to explain that if I had some freedom and time to myself id want to spend more time with him but he doesnt get it... I dont hide anything from him, no passwords on my phone my fb is always logged in on pc and phone so he can check it if he like but its not good enough!
You need to talk to him. Dont jump to conclusions just becoz of his one bad trait.Definitely its a red flag he may try to unintentionally control u but its also a sign that he loves and cares about u.So dont be hopeless ,u shud try to discuss matters with him and if u both love each other u ll definitely find a way. However,individuality is an important trait and make him realise that u really are loyal to him and talking to a guy doesnt mean he is gonna replace him. Build more of trust and ur bf will understand.Right now he is insecure becoz of his past relations but if u really make him feel that u r not going to betray him then he will be fine.Cultivate love and dont feel trapped.Be happy that U both found each other.
I believe that you shouldn't jump into conclusions, and also think about why you feel so trapped. You didn't give us much detail as to why you feel trapped, so it should be good to understand that. Once you do, the best is to talk to him... maybe he doesn't realise he's being possessive and controlling and needs you to open his eyes! Good luck!
He knows what he is doing. He is afraid of losing you, like the last person he trusted and loved. He is having a hard time with trust, not because of you but because of what is in his head from his past relationship(s). If you have never been cheated on or left for another you won't understand the desperation to keep you close to him. He can love deeply, but he's afraid that's all. You should go out but take him with you. You can do group things where you get conversation with others while he is by your side. Maybe he will enjoy and talk a little or be bored and not want to go next time. Maybe you will enjoy yourself while he isn't worried about what some other guy is doing or saying to you. Try to relieve his worry.