Hey I am 24 years old and married to my 31 year old husband for about 2 years now. We just introduced a baby girl into this world 3 wks ago. I do not want to leave out that my husband is a minister in training. I am so unhappy and I do not know what to do anymore. I do not feel like I can live up to the name "preachers wife". I feel disconnected with God and I am losing my mind and maybe my soul as well. Marriage is a big deal to me and my religion. We do not believe in divorce unless fornication is involved. The bible does not authorize it. Which leads me to my unhappiness. Ugh. Please help.
your baby is only 3 weeks old : maybe you're just suffering from "postpartum blues"
possible cause of postpartum depression :
hormonal changes : drop in estrogen and progesterone hormone levels
thyroid levels can drop which leads to fatigue and depression
rapid hormonal changes along with changes in blood pressure, immune system functioning, and metabolism
physical changes : giving birth brings numerous physical and emotional changes - you may be dealing with physical pain from the delivery or difficulties in losing weight
possibly feeling insecure about your physical and sexual attractiveness
the stress of caring for a newborn can also take a toll : new mothers are often sleep deprived - you may feel overwhelmed and anxious about your ability to properly care for your baby
as a "mom" you must get used to an entirely new "identity"
that's why maybe you suddenly feel you can no longer be a "preachers wife" : maybe you wanted to embody a role perfectly but life and in this case giving birth is a "messy" business
maybe you feel shame in not being "perfect" and that's why you feel disconnected from God : but God being all love and your "creator" knows about how it is to be a human being - he knows your most innermost secret feelings and thoughts - how can you feel disconnected from God who lives at the very core of you ?
life on earth is not trying to represent some ideal : it is living a human life with all its foibles and things : I believe Jesus was a good example of that - being a man as well as the son of God and he had I believe his share of trouble and doubts
take good care of yourself : you need to replenish yourself with healthy food and good sleep (and naps) and exercise : if you take good care of yourself - you will be able to take good care of your baby - and I believe your husband is but all too willing to give a helping hand - yes ?
you both must be able to discuss this openly and with love and understanding
wish you well