Advice please :(
I'm looking for a little bit of advice to do with basically my whole life at the moment.
I'll start from the beginning around 7 months ago I met a man now hes almost twice my age and he has 2 gorgeous children from his previous wife. Now I was reluctant to start my relationship with him because of the age gap and obviously I didnt want to get too close to the kids if I didnt think I wanted to be a permanent thing.
Well anyway we got together moved in together and everything was going great until Christmas I went away to visit family for 10 days. During those 10 days while I wasn't home he had his ex wife over to see the kids right here in our own house. now he has told me nothing but horrible things about this woman how she is a threat to us and our family and bla bla he promised me up and down if she was ever back our way to see the kids that he would take the kids to her somewhere anywhere other than our own house obviously that didnt happen and he put her into a taxi that HE PAID FOR and brought her here to our home.
Then on top of that he had her in my car (I didn't want her in my house why the fuck would she be allowed in my car) and drove her to a motel ages away from here.
Now I wouldn't be so bothered if he drove his own car and kept his promise but its really getting to me and i cant ge3t it off my mind my stomach churns at the thought of her being here in my house every time i think about it i break into a physical sweat.
I dont feel like this is 'our' house because i don't have a say in anything. he says things are ours when it seems he wants something but when hes trying to get his own way it all of a sudden becomes his for example we are getting kicked out of the house we currently live in and we were sorting out school arragements for the kids I wasnt willing to drive them 30 minutes to send them to the school theyre already at I wanted to change them but no because he wanted his own way they were his kids not ours.
I'm feeling pretty worthless i feel like ive been walked all over but then at the same time he can be so sweet and loving and i remember why i fell in love with him in the first place.
I am lost and I don't know what to do I know this seems like a rant but I so badly need to get it off my chest and let someone take the time to tell me their point of view
Basically my question is what would you do? would you leave or stay? has anyone been in a similar situation im lost.
Hello sorry your feeling this way I'd also have major issues with the x being in our home,even though same as yours mines been terrible to my oh so her being in the house would definitely be a problem for me especially when I'm out of town.
I fully see your point,in regards to the childrens school I do agree with your oh as moving house is massive stress especially when being evicted so less stress on the kids is always better and if your adamant you don't wish to make the thirty minute trip I can see why he'd have to say their my kids because the best for them is to stay in the school where their friends etc are.If he pulls the it's mine line often maybe you should ask him to sit and have a talk talk with you so you can explain how it makes you feel and gets answers to your whys in regard to the x.Could he have used your car because his was unavailable perhaps?
I don't really see his driving her where she needs to be as a bad thing because imagine the position he's in if his kids have seen their mom n on leaving she's bleating on about how long her return journeys going to be. Then the kids plead with dad to drive mom home.But then without knowing the ins and outs of why they split the fact he has the kids leads me to feel she wasn't up to it or worse.Try speaking if you can but tbh I don't think I nor anyone else can say yes you should leave or no you should stay because only you fully know what you've given and tried before,good luck.xx