Long distance relationship
I'm 15 and this is my first time going to a forum I've been dating my girlfriend for 4 years now but she was only with me for 1 of them and we've been working out a long distance relationship since then. She just turned 14 in December. I have multiple reasons to think she is cheating on me with my best friend now and the feeling is suffocating. She's been the only one to be able to make me laugh these past few years and now she's the first to make me cry since I was 4 years old. Honestly I feel like I've explored all options besides putting my neck in a noose. I've tried talking to people about this but it appears no one I trust has the time for me. It's especially hard since I have a psychological disorder that makes me unable to trust people very well. I've tried talking to her but she hasn't been responding lately which only adds to the pain. I'm just not sure what to do anymore. It's becoming very unhealthy for me I can't sleep and I throw up when I try to eat. I don't want to talk to my parents about it because they didn't support our relationship and I don't really trust them. So since nobody has had the time to talk to me I've just been running to the woods where we first kissed and I cry myself to sleep at that tree. I'm not sure what to do anymore but it's gotten to the point where if the stress doesn't kill me I will. If anyone has any unconventional tips that I haven't tried already please let me know, this forum is my last attempt at trying to get help. I'm sure there's plenty I haven't mentioned but I'm having trouble thinking so I'll say what I need to according to any responses I get.
Hi, I truly understand your feelings.
How long is the distance? I take it your family moved way? is there any chance of your family moving bacK? What exactly is your psychological disorder and are you getting counseling for it? You said you have explored other options such as what?
Distance is across the country driving there wouldn't be an option plane only and only after I saved for a round trip ticket and with the consent of my parents. It was she who moved. Before she moved near me and started going to school her dad had landed in prison. About 6 months after we had started dating she learned that be had gotten out of prison and was forced to move back to be with him. My disorder doesn't really have a name the only reason I know I have one is because one of the psychologist I did see realized I had an extreme issue with trusting him with anything I've tried talking to my school councillor and my pastor about how I feel but I've found that their schedules just can't seem to fit me in. Some of my options included talking to a professional about how I felt, talking to my girlfriend in which I found out that she has a complicated relationship with him that involves him using suicide and self inflicted injuries to pressure her into "dating" him I'm glad she was able to trust me enough to tell me this but I'm still not sure what to do, I've tried talking to him but all he does is curse at me and block me. I've reached out to friends but they just can't seem to take my situation maturely in the way it's "you have a girlfriend? >:o" or "you know she's probably cheating on you *snicker snicker* I don't know who else to turn to. The stress is still effecting me severely. I've even looked to running away to her but found that un logical seeing as not only would it take me months to get so far even if I could get and keep directions to her for the duration of that time but my parents would call the police to hunt me down agian.
And as a side note I obviously see suicide won't solve any problems now but at the same time without being there for her I don't know what to do. She's getting even more depressed between the long distance relationship my best friend practically saying date me or I'll kill myself to her, and the fact that her parents just don't seem to give a flying fuck about her. I've noticed she's been cutting in our last video chat I'm freaked out I want to help her I want to do something but I just don't know what I can do. My counselor nor my pastor have been able to "fit me into" there schedules no matter how much I press the issue and I don't trust anyone else I know with this. I love her more than life itself and the feeling that I can't be there for her now when she needs me is suffocating. There is probably more to this than what I have typed or even what I can type some things words just can't describe that's why I look to people's eyes to tell what they really think and feel. As a teenager I realize my intense emotions may be interfering with what may be a simple solution. That's why I've been posting on this forum in hopes that someone has that solution.
I need help now my girlfriend just texted me a message claiming she ran away after an argument with her parents I'm not sure who to go to.