Tired of being lonely
I have found that recently my partner of 15years has become damn near a mute. They barely speak and are always into the tv and has no time to talk. They also tend to tell me to go out and mingle but when I am out they call non-stop asking when I will get home and what am I doing that is more important than being home.
I am beginning to feel confined and lonely as well as a bit controlled. I have addressed the issue but they say that they are just being protective and they worry that something bad may happen since the world is not what it used to be.
Any advice or suggestions....?
I think you should talk to your partner and explain that while you are grateful for their care, and fully understand bad things can happen when going out socializing, the only way to be 100% protected from all bad things is to be closed off from society altogether. While I certainly understand the dangers of being vulnerable in a dangerous world (especially for the LGBT), we just have to learn to have eyes in the back of our heads and exercise caution of our surrounding, but feeling controlled by a loved one can cause resentment (Not saying this is the care for you or your situation though).
Congrats on together for 15 years and I hope your relationship will improve :)
Thanks Salvatore, how are you doing?
My fiance' is just changing, I have spoken to him and he says he's trying to get better about it and he's not trying to be controlling but I see no changes and I am already beginning to experience resentment. You were so dead on with that.
Anyway how are things going for you and do you have a Facebook account or some other way we can converse? You did say you were looking for a friend, am I right?
Hi Anika, I guess I'm doing okay all things considering.
Sorry to hear things are going so well; I hope you will both be able to work things out between you, 15 years is a long time, and I'd hate to see it all go down the drain over his overbearing ways. Maybe counseling could help? If the love is still there, you can make it through anything - I believe this in my heart. Maybe you can both come up with a compromise - show him you are capable of handling yourself when going out, it may take time for change, small steps. Sorry If I'm overstepping here, I just truly care.
You sound like a nice person, and I'd be honored to be your online friend. Its doubtful I'd be able to travel anytime soon; unfortunately. My facebook has my home address and relatives on it, so I'll figure something out to chat. One I work up the courage, I'll try the chat room here.
Hey Salvatore, hello nice hearing from you. The love is most definitely still there on my end and I believe so on his end as well.
I am patiently awaiting his recognition that I am capable of caring for myself when alone. I just hope it happens soon. It's frustrating when you feel like someone views you as extremely vulnerable or incapable of holding your own. He needs to recognize I AM NOT A VICTIM!
Well how's your weekend been? Did you do anything exciting or see a good movie?
Talk to you soon.
I would give him a push and tell him to treat you better, or leave. You deserve better and you shouldn't be feeling the way you are. Try giving him a copy of http://www.amazon.com/How-Make-Woman-Happy-Guide-ebook/dp/B00ULJLDSS
and see what reaction you get, I know it turned my relationship around