Bought a house together and got dumped
My gf and I were together for almost 6 years and out of nowhere she ended things. The main problem is we recently bought a house together so we're obviously still living together. One of the things I read the most about being dumped is to cut off all contact and go live your life but that is not an option for me right now.
I was already a jealous person but now I have to worry about her seeing other guys and not know where she goes when she's out and there's nothing I can do about it. It's seriously killing me to see her live her life like nothing happened. She used to say she couldn't wait to marry me and I trusted her more than anyone but now she's like a different person. I just don't know what to do.
What's worse is to be married and to be buying a house together, and you discover your wife is having an affair when, among other things, she screams at you to "LEAVE!!!!!!"
What's worse than that is to be married, buying a house and have a child and your wife screams at you leave her, your (1/2) house and your child together.
You and the EKG machine and the tread mill for chest pain are going to get real close.
I was in the same fix, pay twice the price for rent of an apartment that is half the size of my house? Leave my child without a father in the house because my wife got caught having an affair? Yeah, that's what she wanted.
Try that on for 29 years, and see how you do. I will say this, also. "There is no such thing as free sex." You have sex with someone, they can rip you apart. I'm not advocating anything, I'm just saying as I advance in age, you have sex with someone, there is a price to be paid, or, "There is no such thing as free sex."
I know what it's like to live in the same house with a woman who refuses to even look at you except in anger. Yeah, the chest pains can be horrible. Trying to raise a child between "Now, you said..." discussions when the child is out of the house, and bottling it up for days, weeks, when the child is not out of the house.
I never experienced the woman leaving the house to date other people, as you said. My wife got off work at 3 p.m., and was dating guys from 3 to 5 before I got home, and I never knew for sure what was going on. I knew everything was upside down, but my mind wouldn't let me come to any conclusions, because I didn't want to be living in the house with a monster.
She died of a long illness years ago, and when I came home from the funeral, my mind dropped the brace it had on my brain, and allowed me to think about any topic I wanted to think about, and come to any conclusions.
With that freedom, I said to myself, "She did have an affair, and here are the reasons I now know that."
After the child was grown, I found it difficult to leave because of finances, the house was closer to being paid for and handed one day down to our son, and I didn't know if I could make it on my own. It takes time and experiences. Nothing else will do. You have to become involved in things. Nothing else besides these things will do.
One thing that will help is to get involved with someone else. After six years, that helped me, and I was able to emotionally un-attach from my late wife. At brief contact with light sex emotionally helped. But guess what? The woman was a con artist, and hit me up for a loan which she never repaid and immediately stopped the relationship.
I re-contacted her after a year, two weeks ago, and I am telling myself, "No sex. You can help her out a little, but no sex. She'll use it destroy you." Figure that one out.
So, even if you get involved with another woman to forget about the first one ,you'll, oh, well, I think that's where this movie started. Nobody's figured it out yet.
So I can see how living with a woman you once dated is hard because there's a big chance she is moving on with her life and seeing other people and that has to suck. I'm in a situation where I am pregnant with my boyfriends child an we live together but things don't seem like they will last because he basically tells me that every argument we have. He has cheated before at least twice an then recently sent some practically nude pics to someone at a point in our relationship where we were happy and trying for a baby. I don't get why he did it and he claims to not even remember doing it but I am just so lost because now I know I can survive on my own and want to find my own place but I still love him and he claims he is being faithful but it's so hard for me to trust him. And if our relationship is to end and I allow him to follow me where I move, then I'll be stuck watching him leave the house everyday to see another woman and my heart just could not take it. I can barely take just wondering if he's cheating but to know what he's doing and know I wouldn't be able to say a word I think would break me to pieces. I don't want that for myself and wouldn't wish it on anyone else. I say find your own place and cut your losses. It's not worth the pain to watch her do her own thing and you sit back and fall deeper and deeper into that hole of sadness.
I'm still workin on a decision and I have a few weeks but to try to completely break down someone's thought process and figure out why it didn't work or why they don't want you seems to be an endless pit of unanswered questions that only lead to more sadness and a feeling of betrayel.