Is my girlfriend right for me???
I have been dating a woman for 4 years.
She is 24 I am 39 I ha e two kids from my previous marriage and she has none.
She has not worked since I met her.
She moved in with me and I have taken care of her ever since car payments,food,phone,everything you can imagine. I don't mind taking care of her because in return she takes care of the house lol. Anyhow we have broken up many times for various reasons.
When we go on "breaks" I date other women and she sees other guys then we get back together and she moves back in because she can not take care of herself she always goes back to her parents house when we break up. She is always mad and angry about my past and the other women I have dated and that I have been married and had children before I met her.
She will not get a job and doesn't look for one and its been 7 months since we got back together from the last break up.
She promised me she would get a job if I paid all this money to get her license fixed and insurance right it cost over a thousand to fix that and get her phone to make calls about jobs. We had a small break and she called another guy her ex boyfriend and then admitted to it because she thought I was leaving her.
I do not trust her at all she has lost that from me because of the times she has lied and been caught talking to others during our relationship and during "breaks".
We have tried everything to make this work and still the same problems keep happening over and over its like a broken record that is on repeat she's always mad that she has no job but does nothing during the day to fix it. She is always bringing up the past and has nothing new to argue about so she brings up the past to start a fight. She has told me that she wants to go to counseling but I feel that will not help because I have emotionally removed myself from this relationship already and I have drifted into the protection zone so I don't get hurt again when we break up again which I feel is inevitable so I need any advise at all from any of you that can help me in figuring out what I should do to either fix this or move on. I ha e invested 4 long years with her and there are good times dint get me wrong.
Short answer - no, she's not right for you. You've said it yourself. You don't trust her and the drama continues like a broken record.
She's also resentful of your kids (something someone you date really can't be, to be at all fair to them - your kids deserve a step-mother who adores them), you're resentful of her not working (something she doesn't seem to want to change), it's just a mess.
We're ALL tempted, when the person is sexy, the sex is good, the feelings are there, etc. to overlook obvious deal breakers. There are a LOT here. I think you know the answer.